The first time I heard about visiting or writing to prisoners was at a SA Conference. It sounded good, but I put off doing anything for the next couple of years because of my fears. Stories about prisoners and what they do to sex offenders fed my fears and led me to procrastinate. Finally, another SA member got an SA meeting started in the Albion State Prison near Erie, PA, where I live. Outside members were invited into the prison in February 2000. I was initially afraid of talking to the prison officials about being a Sexaholic volunteer. When I was going through the security check for my first meeting, I encountered some friends and fellow church-goers who were attending another volunteer group. They asked me, “What are you doing here?” I’m sure most of us have been in that embarrassing moment, and I had to come up with a fast, honest answer, “It’s a spirituality program.” God has a wonderful sense of humor.

Walking across the “Yard” among prisoners was intimidating at first. I don’t know why or how I had concluded that sexaholics in the prison would be any different from sexaholics outside prison. Before I went to my first meeting I thought I was going into prison to “help them” become sober. That myth changed at the very first meeting. We were fellow sexaholics helping each other stay sober one day at a time. And that has been the case ever since.

In the beginning, the group wrestled with some basic issues: trust, confidentiality, honesty, and sponsorship. Could they trust us outsiders? Are we part of the prison system? Will we tell what we hear to others? Can we trust you? We soon learned that information is power in prison. And so, we emphasized the need for complete honesty and confidentiality. We led with our weaknesses, although we didn’t reveal everything at once. But everything about our addiction, we did. By us doing so, they began to open up also. (We still don’t reveal personal information, such as phone numbers and family info, as recommended by the prison staff.)

Four outside volunteers attend the Tuesday night meeting, and within a year a second meeting was started on Saturday morning. I attend the Tuesday meeting every week. Over these two years, I’ve heard many First Steps, witnessing men struggle with their addiction. Long term sobriety has become a reality in their lives because of Sexaholics Anonymous. One member has celebrated two years of sobriety; many have a year. I am grateful to be a part of their recovery.

In December 2000, a year and a month after their first SA meeting, the administration gave permission to have their first SA Marathon/Retreat. I was fortunate to be co-chair of that first SA Marathon in prison. The inmates have just completed their fifth Retreat in March 2002. Twelve outside SA members from the Erie area attended.

The prison officials have seen the benefits of SA and these Retreats, thus allowing four retreats a year to be scheduled. I have personally attended many Marathons/Retreats in this area. These at Albion Prison are truly well planned according to all the traditions of good SA recovery.

Because of my positive experience at the Albion Prison I signed up to be a “sponsor by mail.” I have found that this too has its benefits and challenges. But I have found that whenever I am corresponding, I am connecting with a fellow sexaholic, which keeps me sober. I know that there are a lot of prisoners who are seeking recovery through Sexaholics Anonymous and they can only receive it if you and I are willing to give it away.

PS: I am willing to help anyone who is interested in prison retreats and/or marathons.