Focusing his attentions on others in service became more attractive than his self-interest.  

Sobriety was not a possibility for me before starting the Program two and a half years ago. Years of escaping unpleasant aspects of life by fantasizing in my mind and finding ways to pleasure myself seemed unchangeable. Going to my escape drug was an ingrained habit leading me to a kind of despair and hopelessness. I was finally open to the truth that I was sick, addicted, and unable to find hope by myself. 

Having just finished another round of the Steps with my sponsor, I have a new appreciation for Step 12. In particular, ongoing recovery has had an impact on my decisions to act with love and care. In the past, I would have been more motivated by self-interest. What is attractive to me are the many ways of service offered as a practical way of taking those actions of love.

One surprise for me is what I’m doing right now in offering this little share of my experience in hopes that it may encourage others on the way. Previously, there was no thought of taking time and effort for service beyond my local fellowship. I was serving as literature chairperson, meeting leader, timekeeper, and secretary at different times and was satisfied that that was enough action. Sponsoring others also became part of my involvement. 

There are a number of groups and programs that I belong to that fit the service criteria. I can see occasional contributions to this journal and volunteering for days of recovery and conventions as further opportunities for giving instead of getting. When I saw the request for proofreaders for ESSAY, it caught my attention. This looks like something that fits my interests, and it doesn’t look like much time would be involved. 

My life has much improved since facing reality instead of escaping to fantasy in its many forms. Taking actions of love brings healing, peace, and hope. Being of service keeps me more outward-focused than self-preoccupied. Ongoing sobriety is not only possible but happening. Take the next best step, one day at a time.