I had three prayers before I got sober in AA in 2003. They were:
- “God, give me what I want.”
- “God, please make this person do what I want.”
- “God, if you get me out of this one I promise I’ll never do it again.”
I asked God to keep me sober from alcohol, but I kept on lusting, acting out sexually, and praying my way: “God give me what I want.” I came to SA because my life depended on it. I was a broken man, beaten down by my addiction, depressed, insane, and suicidal.
I learned the true power of prayer when I opened the White Book. An SA member took me through the “18 Wheeler” [Overcoming Lust and Temptation, SA 158-168] and I started to tap into the surprising power of prayer. Before SA, I didn’t believe in prayer. I said them, but my actions were hollow. I wasn’t praying from a place of faith and a desire to surrender.
The “18 Wheeler” was a revelation! This golden text is laden with short, powerful prayers that really work. To this day, my two favorite prayers from the “18 Wheeler” are “I surrender my right to lust after this person; please take it away” (SA 159) and “Whatever it is I’m looking for now, let me please find it in You” (SA 165).
These short prayers capture the spirit of my desire to surrender. They are a powerful antidote to fending off the tyrant lust. This way of praying really helped me build a relationship with my Higher Power that works for me. They saved my life. Until SA, I never really relied on Him, asked to do His will, and I certainly wasn’t ready to surrender my lust.
I went back to my AA Big Book and re-read a clean copy. I was amazed by how many great prayers there are in the book! Whenever the AA book says “We ask…” that’s a prayer! Here are some examples:
Resentment (AA 67): “We asked God to help us show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that we would cheerfully grant a sick friend. When a person offended we said to ourselves, ‘This is a sick man. How can I be helpful to him? God save me from being angry. Thy will be done.’”
Make it a Prayer: “God, ____________ is sick and suffering, just like me. Please help me show them the same tolerance, pity, and patience that I would cheerfully grant a sick friend. This is a sick man/woman. Show me how I can be helpful to them. God, save me from being angry. Thy will be done.”
Fear (AA 68): “We ask Him to remove our fear and direct our attention to what He would have us be.”
Make it a Prayer: “God, please remove my fear and direct my attention to what you would have me be.”
The Design for Living on pages 86-88 is one of the most prayer-laden passages:
Morning (AA 86): “Before we begin (our day), we ask God to direct our thinking, especially asking that it be divorced from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.”
Make it a Prayer: “God, please direct my thinking. Please divorce it from self-pity, dishonest or self-seeking motives.”
Writing my own personal prayers has become part of my Step 11 practice. I recently led a prayer breakout at an SA retreat. We reviewed key passages from the AA Big Book and then we wrote our own prayers and shared with the group. What a powerful experience, a whole room of people were writing and sharing their own prayers!
One morning, I was brushing my teeth and this beautiful, simple prayer just popped into my head. I give HP the credit: “God, thank you for your love, care, and protection. May I always follow your Good Orderly Direction.”
Amen and thank you.
Matthew S., Georgia, USA
