One of the highlights of the international convention in Los Angeles was finally meeting my first (and now former) sponsee, John H. After six years of phone conversations and occasional Zoom meetings, we met in person in California. Being my first sponsee, he often referred to himself as my “guinea pig.”

We began our sponsor-sponsee relationship on August 11, 2018. I was six days sober and experiencing a new-found sense of not being so selfish. Instead of focusing so narrowly on myself, I enjoyed having a sponsee call me when he was in trouble. I gradually realized that his struggles were helping me maintain my sobriety and stay connected to the Program. Also, being so green in my own recovery, I would wonder, …if my sponsee jumps off the bridge would it be my fault? What if I could have stopped him? Eventually, I came to accept that I was not responsible for making or keeping him sober.

John lives in California, not too far from this convention. I sponsored him for about the first 10 months of my sobriety. Now we’re both involved in service in our respective intergroups. Thanks to the L.A. convention planning committee and many trusted servants, we finally had the opportunity to meet, hug, fist bump, high five, share our joys, and even serve together co-leading a breakout session.

I also had the pleasure of meeting Grant from the UK. We are SA friends who met during a Zoom meeting during the pandemic. I later came to sponsor him. During the convention weekend, we joined with two other SA members (from Alaska and Ghana/US) to drive out to Simi Valley where we visited Roy K.’s gravesite and paid homage to the founder of SA. Each of us stood around Roy’s burial plot and shared a Roy K. story, an aspect of our life that was influenced by the work Roy K. did in Sexaholics Anonymous.

We concluded our little trip with the Serenity Prayer before returning to the convention to prepare for the closing session. As odd as it may sound, this trip to the cemetery turned out to be a highlight of my convention experience. I try to show my gratitude for Roy K.’s sacrifices and contributions to this “impossible fellowship” by paying it forward. Despite Roy K. being an ordinary man, I hope the Fellowship will continue to honor his memory and that of others who paved the way, making SA accessible to those who need, want, seek it.