Humbly Asking

Humbly asked Him to remove our shortcomings (AA 59).

Asking for something means that I am not in control of the outcome. I may get what I asked for, I may not. It may look like I expect it to, it may not. I never was very comfortable with this before. I strove to set up my life so that no one could refuse me what I wanted. Sometimes I demanded, sometimes I manipulated, sometimes I threatened, but I never just asked and let go of the outcome.

In my recovery, I am learning that I don’t know what’s best for me. Asking allows things to work out the way they need to rather than how I might think they should. Asking with an open heart requires that I let go of my expectations, that I do what’s in front of me and let go of the outcome.

When I ask for a defect to be removed, I assume it’s a defect because my experience shows me that I have used it to do harm. I am learning that my Higher Power can use everything for the greater good. I am learning that my view of what is a defect and how it might be removed are very limited.

God, help me to become who You would have me be.

Anonymous

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