Twenty-five years ago, having had a first spiritual awakening, I embarked on a month-long pilgrimage to Europe, traveling alone. The trip ended in my acting out in a public place, and the final, inescapable realization that I was powerless over lust. This admission brought me to SA.

Now in 2014, I was given the opportunity to make another trip to Europe. Earlier this year, I was wondering how I would celebrate my 25th sobriety anniversary. I prayed for an opportunity to tell my story. Then in June I got a call from a friend in the UK, inviting me to the Ammerdown Convention, to be held September 5-7. At first I was full of reasons not to go—too costly, too tiring, too far to go, etc. I prayed for knowledge of God’s will and the power to carry it out.

But my objections were swept away when the UK Intergroup—by group conscience vote—chose me to speak. Their vote gave me a clear indication of God’s will. I had only to surrender and trust the plan.

I arrived at Heathrow on September 2, and the adventure began. Before the conference, I was invited to meetings at Bournemouth, Dorchester, and Exeter, where I met wonderful UK members and a couple of newcomers. Then we all traveled together to Ammerdown.

What a spot! The retreat center is on the grounds of an old manor house. The weather was mild, and many of us gathered in the sunny courtyard. There I met members from around the UK, Ireland, and Europe. The atmosphere was relaxed and there was ample time for fellowship. I was finally recovering from my jet lag, but I knew that I had been skimping on prayer and meditation. So I spent some time with God before my time came to speak.

Every time I tell my story, it becomes real to me again that I have a Higher Power who has looked after me every step of the way. As I spoke, I remembered all the people who had a hand in leading me to sobriety—especially my sponsors, who showed me what sobriety looks like. I talked about the unity of our fellowship, based upon our common sobriety definition. I felt love beaming at me from all around the room.

The rest of the trip was a whirlwind of cities, SA meetings, and wonderful people. Crossing over to France in the Channel Tunnel, we held what may be the first underwater SA meeting! Driving through Belgium, we passed many military cemeteries—reminders of two great wars.

This got me thinking about our Eleventh Step prayer: “Lord, make me a channel of your peace.” Perhaps I, as an imperfect sexaholic, could be a channel of God’s peace to my fellow members at the meetings I visited. After all, every time one of us tries to help another suffering sexaholic, we add a bit of peace to God’s world—and this became the theme of my spiritual journey. But the only way I could be a channel of God’s peace is by staying sober.

In Antwerp, we arrived during a celebration of peace commemorating 100 years since the start of World War I. At the SA meeting that night, I admired the literature table, which displayed many SA pamphlets (all translated into Flemish), as well as a generous selection of Essay magazines. In Lille I attended a French-speaking meeting with eight other members. I was delighted to be able to Twelfth-Step a newcomer. In Paris we assisted in the first-ever official SA meeting in the City of Light. In Luxembourg we participated in an SA information meeting in three languages: German, French, and English.

My doubts about the journey had been resolved, my prayers were answered. I do have something to offer: I can share the gift of my sobriety, and the Steps that brought me to it. I can be a channel of the love I’ve received—and the love I bring today is worth something because it is clean and blessed.

Twenty-five years ago, traveling alone in Europe, I tried to connect with the people I met, but the only connection I knew how to make was one of lust. Now I was given a chance to make a new trip, on a different footing. This time I traveled from meeting to meeting flanked by sober members, surrounded by love. While before I was taking from others, this time I had a new Source of strength, and I was able to give. On this journey my eyes were opened to see a bigger world, and I saw my Higher Power at work in every meeting, every share, and every member’s sobriety.

Thanks to all of the members in the UK and Europe who welcomed me to your meetings and your homes. I am now a part of you, as you will always be a part of me. Your struggles are my struggles; your pain, my pain; your victories—what wonderful victories!—are my victories too.

As I celebrated my anniversary on October 22, I was grateful for the many gifts given to me by the European fellowship. May God bless you all in the measure with which you have blessed me.