My first SA sponsor, Frank S. (also known as Francis), passed away on Sunday, March 3rd at the ripe old age of 90, about one month away from his 91st birthday. I first met Frank in early December 2000, around 6:30 on a Saturday morning in San Diego He was 78 at the time, and he had just returned earlier that week from visiting China. Frank traveled a lot and knew people all over the world.

That Saturday morning was my first SA meeting, and Frank gave me my orientation. He told me a little about what it was like, what happened, and what it’s like now in his life. He said that he had found sobriety at age 70, and that he (like most of us) had come to SA by circumstance, not by virtue. I could tell that this man had had a life-changing experience. I decided I wanted what he had, and I asked him on the spot to be my temporary sponsor.

Frank told me that sponsorship is critical, as is working the Steps. I believed what he said and began following his direction from the start, at first mainly because I was desperate but later because what I was doing was beginning to change my life—and boy did it need changing! My wife of five years had just moved out to live with her mother. She told me she could not live like this anymore. I was at the end of my rope. And God, SA, and Frank were there for me when I was in despair and needed help in a bad way. For this I can never be sufficiently grateful.

Frank suggested I go to as many meetings as possible—90 meetings in 90 days if I could, and I came pretty close. On Thursday nights (the one night we don’t have meetings in San Diego), Frank would faithfully meet me for dinner. The name of the restaurant was “Frank’s Happy Chef!” I shared many of my Steps with Frank there, and I even heard a few Steps from his other sponsees.

Frank was a wonderful sponsor and helped me get a great start in SA. He was also a great example of the value of International conventions. I don’t think he missed one convention in more than 10 years of attending them. He made many friends at the conventions, and they still ask about him—even at the recent convention in January 2013. Frank told me that a convention can be a life-changing experience if I want it to be, and that was true for me when I went to my first International convention in January of 2001 in Orange County.

Here in San Diego, Frank’s dedication helped keep the daily morning meetings going. He was often the only one who showed up to keep the doors open. His service helped keep him sober and helped many others to stay sober as well. I am one of those people, and I hope I can pass on even a portion of the help I received from Frank. Maybe I’ll see him again one day as I trudge the road of happy destiny.