Dear ESSAY

A spilled cup of coffee

I recently listened to a recording where Mike C. talked about the gift of recovery and what it looks like now. It was powerful to hear him share some of the things he had been able to do since getting sober that he would never have been able to do before. It was beautiful.

While listening to the recording, I was creating a really neat scavenger hunt for my daughter’s Girl Scout troop that involved a locked, wooden box that they had to open. It took weeks to make, working diligently on my days off to finish on time. While Mike gave his examples, I realized I was living my own, and ended up in my workshop crying tears of joy and gratitude. In my disease, I never would have found time to do that. A previous sponsor used to tell me that recovery lets us gain back what lust had hijacked.

This morning, I spilled my ENTIRE cup of coffee on my work clothes during the stress of getting kids ready for school. After a long breath, and a little pain, I think my first words to my kids were “Well, that was unfortunate.” Only afterwards did it occur to me that might be some progress in emotional sobriety. That’s not the way I would have handled it without God working on my life through others in recovery. I wasn’t taught or shown this growing up.

I am no saint. I certainly have a long way to go, both in my personal recovery and being of service to other sexaholics and to my family. I’m still sick and in need of “medicine” daily. But I want to give God thanks for these and other examples of how my life is better sober (physically and emotionally) and in recovery. I would do well not to overlook even the little things. I’m glad to be on this road with you all today.

Daniel B., Tennessee, USA

The Boxer and the Recovering Sexaholic

The boxer trains by hitting the heavy bag, the speed bag, jumping rope and running – miles. He is not a boxer officially until he gets into the ring and fights an opponent. He is now a boxer; not just in training.

And so it is with the sexaholic. He trains by reading the literature, working the Steps, attending meetings, and so on. He is not a recovering sexaholic until he steps into the ring of temptation to lust and successfully gets progressive victory over lust.

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Diz B., Ohio, USA
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