He and his group could survive and thrive with the Traditions.

The Twelve Traditions of SA are a vital adjunct to the Twelve Steps of SA. While the Twelve Steps help the individual sexaholic recover and enjoy life, the Twelve Traditions help SA groups survive and thrive. As my grand sponsor colorfully described it, “The Twelve Steps help prevent sexaholics from committing suicide, while the Twelve Traditions prevent us from committing homicide—and the Twelve Concepts prevent us from committing genocide!”

When I came into the Fellowship, I was exclusively focused on the Twelve Steps. I needed to find a solution to the problem that was making my life unmanageable. Once I had found that solution, however, I quickly became concerned about ensuring that my SA group survived, so I could too! Fortunately, the Twelve Traditions helped with that. They show us how to live and work the program in unity with our fellow SAs. Three of the Traditions that have been especially helpful and comforting to me are as follows. 

Tradition One: “Our common welfare should come first; personal recovery depends upon SA unity” (Service Manual ch. 1 p. 3). This reminds me that the welfare of the group comes before anyone’s personal welfare, including my own! That was hard for me to accept at first, as I was chiefly concerned with my own recovery! But as I surrendered my selfishness, the wisdom and benefit of this tradition became apparent.

Tradition Two: “For our group purpose, there is but one ultimate authority — a loving higher power as expressed to our group conscience. Our leaders are but trusted servants; they do not govern” (Service Manual ch.1 p. 3). This tradition was especially meaningful because my home group had some strong, domineering personalities and controversial issues. I initially feared that one or more of these individuals would end up running the group and setting up rules that I could not abide. After all, we are all, by our own admission, restless, irritable, and discontented! Fortunately, Tradition Two has prevented that from occurring.

Tradition Five: “Each group has but one primary purpose—to carry its message to the sexaholic who still suffers” (Service Manual ch. 1 p. 3). This has also been extremely helpful in keeping my groups and me focused on our sole purpose and refraining from outside issues (Tradition Ten).