I am a 47-year-old sexaholic, lustaholic, alcoholic inmate, serving a sentence of 18-80 years, for a variety of crimes. The majority of my life has been spent behind the walls of one institution after another. This is the only “home” I know. There was a sex crime involved in each one of my adult convictions (but I began acting out at the age of 13). Although I never even thought of masturbation until the age of 13, I still had an abnormal interest in sex.

My first masturbation experience was curiosity; my second, and succeeding were pure resentment and frustration. I was seething with resentment toward my mother (who had deserted us), toward my grandmother, who disciplined me, toward my two step-mothers, who deserted us, in turn. I was resentful toward the girls in school because I didn’t know how to relate to them. I withdrew inward, completely. I felt like a social outcast. It was me against them, especially females, since my fear grew, as I became more isolated from them.

At the age of 21 I was arrested for my first sexual crime. Since 1969, I have been on the “outside” a total of 10 months. I have been placed in various programs geared to rehabilitation. I have had countless sessions with psychiatrists, psychologists, sex therapists, etc. I have tried various religions and been on various psychosomatic drugs. None of these worked.

So if SA works for me, it can surely work for you. For the first time in my life I feel a part of something good, something worthwhile. The two weekly meetings we are permitted here are the most meaningful aspect of my life. I always thank God for the program, for the love and acceptance my fellow members from the outside never fail to give me. May God bless all of you and help us to stay sober “one day at a time.”