“The chief activator of our defects has been self-centered fear—primarily fear that we would lose something we already possessed or would fail to get something we demanded” (12&12 76).

My self-centered fear is invisible to me. What may be obvious to others as my ego disease often looks to me like the “real world” or the facts of my life. Add to that my irrational conviction that “what I’m feeling right now will last forever,” and it’s no wonder I go crazy with fear! Feeling hopeless, I retreat into a convenient character defect: lusting, anger, judging, or isolation.

When I listen to other members speak of their own battles with ego, and about humility as a healer of pain, I begin to find hope. I start to see my character defects as manifestations of self-centered fear rather than as real problems. With my new humility, I pray for God to remove all my shortcomings, including my myopic view of life!

When I trust that God will provide what I need, rather than what I demand, I can relax and accept my life as it is. And that acceptance brings with it—what a gift!—the serenity and wholeness I really wanted all along.