Courage to Change—something that I wasn’t capable of before coming to the program. I was the one who never said ”no” to anyone—I had to prove my worthiness by doing anything anyone wanted me to, and by helping people while forgetting to take care of myself.

First, I showed “courage to change” (without even knowing) when I came to the program. Things changed slowly when I worked the Steps and gained sobriety. I cannot change the starting point of my life, but I can change what I do next. I have learned to identify my toxic behavior and accept myself as I am. Thus I have courage to change what I do in my daily life.

For example, I was able to ask for a work schedule that suits me better and does not load me too much—and instead of firing me it was ok for my boss. Also, I am able to get joy from helping others, while I don’t need to do everything ”right now”—I can ask my friends if they can wait until I have more space in my calendar. So far, no one has rejected me or behaved differently towards me.

Another great example in my life came when I met my wife, and showed courage to change when I was able to be honest enough about my addiction instead of hiding it. The fear of rejection was huge, but I had to be fair for her. Fear was imaginary again—and our relationship had a stronger foundation based on honesty and after that we were able to speak about anything.

Courage to change—such a great gift from my Higher Power! With this simple thought I have gained more joy and resources in my life, even though I first came to the program just to get rid of my porn addiction.

I still tend to please people at the expense of my own health at times, but then I am rapidly reminded that something is wrong when I start to get tired and resentful again. The Serenity Prayer! I have tools in my hands—I just need to ask for courage to change the things I can instead of being just a victim of the situation.

The Serenity Prayer is something that comes easily just by a routine in the meetings. Why not try and meditate on it a little in the next meeting? This short prayer has a huge amount of wisdom in it, and it can have more meaning for me, if I try to apply it in my daily life with the help of my Higher Power.