The Man Who Met God

There was a sexaholic walking down the street. He’d been there before, but this time, as he was walking, he met God. Now God had something in His hand and it looked good to the sexaholic.

He asked God, “What do you have in your hand Lord?” God answered, “Sobriety, I have sobriety in my hand.”

The sexaholic said, “God that looks good to me, I’d like to have it. What would it cost me?” So, God said to the sexaholic, “What do you have to offer me for it?”

The sexaholic says, “Well, I have $50.” God says, “Well for you it will cost $50.”

The sexaholic, who now (like most of us sexaholics will) starts to back out of the deal and he says to God, “Well, I’d like sobriety, but if I give you my $50 then I won’t be able to buy gas for my car.” God then says, “Oh, you have a car? Sobriety will cost you the car too.”

So now the sexaholic starts bargaining with God. “Well if I also give you my car, then I won’t be able to get to work!” God then says, “You have a job…sobriety will cost you your job also!”

The sexaholic then tells God, “If I give you my job then I won’t be able to make the payments on my house.” God says, “You have a house! I thought you lived down by the tracks in a cardboard box! No, sobriety will cost you your house too!”

The sexaholic says to God, “If I give you my house then I won’t have any place to take care of my wife and children.” God says to the drunk, “You have a family? Sobriety will cost you your family also…..”

Then the sexaholic says, “God if I give you my family, then I will have no reason to live.”

God says, “Yes, sobriety will cost you your life too!”

Now the sexaholic, being just at the right state of drunkenness, takes God up on the deal and he becomes sober.

One day he is again walking down the street, sober this time. He may have been coming from an SA meeting or from a twelve step call. In any event, he meets God again.

God says “How is that sobriety treating you?” The (former) sexaholic says “Oh, it’s wonderful!”

God replies, “Good! Now here’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to give you your $50 back. But only so that you can buy gas for the car which I’m also giving you back, but remember, that it’s no longer your car, it’s MY car and it’s only a loan to you. You may have to take sexaholics to meetings with it and even stay with them.

I’m also giving you back your job so you can pay for a house. Now this house is not your house, it’s MY house. You may have to house a sexaholic from time to time for a while to help them.

I’m also giving you your family back, but remember now, they are not YOUR wife and kids any longer, they are MINE and you will treat them as such!

I’m also going to give you your life back, but it’s no longer YOUR life, it’s MY life and you will have to take my direction on how to use it….”

Well so the story goes and as for me, I know that anything that I have is not mine any longer, it’s God’s. As long as I remember that, life seems to work well for me. When I don’t, then my life starts to get troublesome.

God bless you.

Oscar M., Colombia, South America

Total Views: 18|Daily Views: 1

Share This Story, Choose Your Platform!