(In serial form, #4)

Over three sober decades in SA there have been quite a few pieces of “bad news” for us sexaholics. They all arise, like our entire program, from our experience, strength and hope. Each issue of Essay under Practical Tools we’ll share some pieces of “bad news”:

• Acceptance is the answer to all my problems today. There is no wiggle room in this statement.

 • In Steps 9 and 10 we make amends for ourselves so we don’t have to lust again. An amends is humiliating. We must actually change our behavior – that’s what “amend” means.

• Ego deflation in depth is the norm, not the exception, in our recovery. Almost none of us like ego deflation. However, it is essential for sobriety and recovery.

• A faced fear vanishes. There may still be a problem or embarrassment or challenge – just no fear.

• “If you spot it, you got it.” When something is said about another person (by them or to them), it may or may not be true about them. It is ALWAYS true about the person saying it.