I had a sponsee who would call me every day with a check in. I laid out a daily program of action like the one that was given to me. Every few days he would call to report he had lost his sobriety. I would say the same thing every time. Did you slide out of bed to your knees for morning prayers? Did you do your daily readings? Did you call 2 other SA members? And so forth. His answers were always the same, a half-measures “no” on most of the suggestions.
One day he raged at me and said, in the middle of my questions, “You ask me the same f’ing questions every day, can’t we just have a normal conversation?” After a pause I continued: “Did you call two people in the program?” He interrupted and said “f’ this” and hung up. Then about 30 minutes later he called back and let me know he made a chart with every stupid question on it. He said every day he is going to do everything on the f’ing list. At the bottom he has a check box that says “sober.” He raged and said, “If I check every f’ing thing on this list and I am not sober” …long pause, translation… “I am going to come over there and kill you!”
Thirty days later, still sober, he was absolutely amazed. And, we could actually have conversations that didn’t surround the daily checklist.
Here is a basic starter check list kit for newcomers. These are only suggestions (just like I suggest that you do not step off the roof of a 46 floor building).
• First thing every morning before you get up to use the restroom slide out of bed to your knees and pray the following:
“God thank you for letting me wake up sober. God I am powerless over my ___, I surrender my ____ to you (start with Lust). God I desperately need your power, please lend me your power just for today. So Thy Will Be Done!” Then pray the Third Step Prayer (memorized).
• Preferably as you start your day read the following:
Alcoholics Anonymous 30-31 (Most of – ad infinitum.)
Alcoholics Anonymous 86-88 (On awakening – to Step Twelve.)
Alcoholics Anonymous 417-420 (And acceptance – Thank God for A.A.!)
2 pages Alcoholics Anonymous (with a Dictionary) xi-181 — highlight all prayers, 2 pages White Book, 2 pages of other Spiritual Literature
• Call two members and your sponsor every day. Get more phone numbers.
• Before going to bed at night, kneel at bedside and pray the following:
“God thank you for keeping me sober today. God I am powerless over my ___, I surrender my ____ to you. God I desperately need your power, please lend me your power just for tonight. So Thy Will Be Done!” Then pray the Third Step Prayer.
• When you detect a temptation, “DO NOT” attempt to fight it. Instead go to God, admit powerlessness, surrender and ask God for His power. Then call another member in the fellowship.
• Read White Book pages 157-168 “Overcoming Lust & Temptation.” Highlight all the prayers in the section and write them on a 3×5 card. Carry it with you. When tempted, recite some of the prayers until the temptation passes.
• Go to 90 meetings in 90 days! SA local meetings plus SA phone in meetings.
• Find a place to volunteer once a week.
Dennis T., Alaska, USA