Light the Way

On March 13, 2014, John C. of Rochester, NY passed away. He was a real beacon to those of us who knew and interacted with him. This included sponsors, sponsees, fellow SA members here and around the world, and members of SA’s International service structure.

I started writing to John in 1995 when he was serving prison time in Groveland, NY. It was my privilege to share Twelve Step spirituality with him and then to observe how the light of his spirit flowed when he was released from prison and began to follow the SA path of recovery.

As a convicted sex offender, John faced many hardships on the outside, some due to the strictures of probation and some from the community at large. In sobriety, he was fired from a volunteer job at his beloved firehouse. He was forbidden to be a lector at the church of his choice. He was forced to leave his apartment. Through it all, he never stopped caring and loving—a way of life he learned through the Twelve Steps. This outpouring of love was extended to his personal family, with whom he was able to achieve healing, and to his SA family. He led by example in his own sobriety, in his leadership in SA, in his honesty, and in his caring for his SA sisters and brothers.

As gentle as he could be, John was a staunch supporter of the SA principles and Traditions. He fully appreciated how these saved him and provided a framework for recovery. He led a life of service, fueled by his desire to give other sexaholics the same healing and opportunities that were given to him.

Though I grieve his passing, the lesson of John’s life is a comfort to me—that out of a humble and emotionally wounded place, a man with a spirit of love for his fellow humans and a willingness to extend himself for others can shine his light on us all.

It is said that to emulate a person is the greatest way to honor his memory. As we try to follow in John’s footsteps to carry the SA message of recovery, let us also carry his light.

Miller A., Rochester, NY

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