[Regarding the subject of what to do about sex offenders and the whole business of sexual dependency counseling] I have made a decision not to mix up the program with counseling. Looking back, I see how crazy I was to even consider getting involved in a “professional” way! My main area of interest—profession-wise—is in spiritual direction.… Spiritual direction and the 12-Step program are real compatible. I am finding that quality Step work…accomplishes a lot of what is “therapeutic” according to the professionals. Anyway, I have lost my desire to get into this type of counseling. There are just too many dangers to my own recovery and a sense of compromising the spirituality of the program.
I am still unclear about offenders (level 3 acting out). The professional community is adamant that SA cooperate with them. They think that recovery for the offender is different (requires a separate program) than the “ordinary” sexaholic. My opinion is that the “quality” of lust and the power of the compulsion is no different, although consequences and unmanageability are. The man who masturbates compulsively seems to be in just as much bondage to lust as the incestuous parent. I think the program, if worked, is equally effective. I understand the concern about offenders, but disagree with professionals about recovery. It may be more difficult for offenders to be open and honest about their acting out—because of fear and social taboo. But I notice that when they do disclose, recovery can happen for them like any sexaholic.
Our group conscience (roughly) is not to report offenders the first time they disclose but to impress on them the steps and the need to deal with the unmanageability and to bring the legal system in if necessary—on their own. SA members here may be the first in our area to contact Social Services to report on their own behaviors and to try and make things right!
Is there any more info on the stand of SA regarding offenders and the disclosure of their acting out in meetings? In this area there is no help available for offenders—just jail! If they are really going to work the Steps they will have to take the law into consideration at some point, or does the group turn them over to the law right off the bat? Any thoughts? Or can you put me in touch with others with experiences in this area?
T.G., Regina, Sask.
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