(In serial form, #5)

Over three sober decades in SA there have been quite a few pieces of “bad news” for us sexaholics. They all arise, like our entire program, from our experience, strength and hope:

• Worrying about the rest of my life is none of my business — if I am working Step 3.

• The Rule of 180˚: I figure out exactly how I want to react or what I want to say. Then I do the opposite, which turns out to be the best choice. The Rule of 180˚ saves a lot of trouble!

• When I don’t want to go to a meeting or make a phone call is exactly when I most need to do it.

• If we want clear water, don’t stir the bottom of the pond. Dredging up the past clouds our vision.

• Telling the truth is a great fall-back position.

• Two “automatic” contributions to a resentment/obsession are: 1) holding on to the resentment for a long time and 2) expecting another person to be different than the way they actually are.

• Having opinions, about anything at all, is always optional. Most relationship problems are caused by opinions.

• Expectations are pre-meditated resentments.