My rock bottom was struck in 1999 when my daughter stumbled across some online chat I left on my computer. For some, suicide is the ultimate rock bottom. For me, losing the respect of my children in this manner was far worse. That particular story ends with me joining SA and, eventually, making amends to my kids for my online conduct during and before that rock bottom.

I lost my first marriage. After years of seeking reconciliation, I accepted the cost of what I had done. One year ago yesterday, I married a wonderful woman.

Just before our anniversary dinner, my new stepdaughter picked up my iPhone without my noticing. She became curious and began snooping through the contents. She soon stumbled across the notepad where I type private reminders. She began reading my most intimate messages, ones I had meant only for my eyes.

The words she read were: “Surrender. Powerless. Unmanageable. Came to believe. Made a decision. Inventory. Admitted.” Those were notes I had jotted down several days before when thinking about the program. Nothing else was there to find. My stepdaughter got very little out of her snooping. Just a few puzzling words and nothing else. But I got a major reality check.

What a difference between the two events. Because of a Power that surely is greater than myself, my house was in order. You kept me coming back.