webmaster, Author at The ESSAY Magazine

In My Sober Life
Gallery
In My Sober Life

In My Sober Life

Finding Strength in Higher Power and Self-Discovery My name is Aaron M., and I’m a lust addict. One of the biggest parts of self-discovery in my recovery is the vast gulf that exists between who I am when I’m practicing sobriety and who I am when I’m in active addiction. They’re almost (but not quite!) two different people, with their own personalities and motivations. My sober self goes completely out the window whenever I take that first lust drink and the “other guy” kicks in.

By Aaron M., Dublin, Ireland|2025-04-22T13:15:11-05:00April 11, 2025|Comments Off

Images of Recovery
Gallery
Images of Recovery

Images of Recovery

Making recovery artwork helps my own recovery. This piece represents the journey of recovery as described in the Big Book. The figure in the center symbolizes a recovered individual with his own unique light and color. As each recovered member crosses through the gate of freedom, he carries his own colorful light, contributing to the collective glow of our souls.

By Tasneem Y., Mansoura, Egypt|2025-04-22T13:15:58-05:00April 11, 2025|Comments Off

SA CFC 2
Gallery
SA CFC 2

SA CFC 2

Even when cut off from the world, you’re never cut off from recovery. A few years ago, I wrote an article about my experience sponsoring incarcerated fellows by mail. How different it is now to be one of them! As if I needed further proof that I’m just another “bozo on the bus”!

By Matt J., Texas, USA|2025-04-15T06:15:48-05:00April 11, 2025|Comments Off

SA CFC 1
Gallery
SA CFC 1

SA CFC 1

How a sponsor changed my life All my life I went to church, served others, and believed in a higher power. I am married with seven children. However, I lived a secret life of pornography addiction for 27 years. I had a lot of trauma I did not know how to deal with after being abused as a child several times by four different men while growing up. My pornography use eventually led to a crime that put me in prison for four years.

By Anonymous, Utah, USA|2025-04-15T06:15:40-05:00April 11, 2025|Comments Off

Editor’s Corner
Gallery
Editor’s Corner

Editor’s Corner

Enjoy this April 2025 edition of the ESSAY and take a load off of yourself. Yes, you’re still responsible for clearing away the wreckage of your past, but remind yourself that although Higher Power still lets you struggle in your character defects so you can grow and progress, you’re not responsible for removing them. That’s God’s job! Surrender it all to Him.

By Kevin B., Fill-in Coordinator for the April Issue|2025-04-11T05:26:37-05:00April 11, 2025|Comments Off

Dear ESSAY
Gallery
Dear ESSAY

Dear ESSAY

Dear ESSAY, Thank you again for the contributions of this magazine to our fellowship. It is very important! So many of our members look forward to the next issue. During the months that I spend in West Africa every year in fellowship with SA members, we download and distribute the current issue of the ESSAY. We don't have many hard copies of the White Book since the international mail and local m

By Kwaku K., Ghana & USA|2025-04-11T05:26:44-05:00April 10, 2025|Comments Off

Offering Instead of Only Asking God for Help
Gallery
Offering Instead of Only Asking God for Help

Offering Instead of Only Asking God for Help

True surrender isn’t just asking for help—it’s offering ourselves to God’s plan. In the Program, I’ve been building the muscle of asking God for help. “Help me be sober! Help me turn away from lust! Help me surrender! Help me! Help me! Help me!” As I strengthen this muscle—which sometimes requires an act of complete reliance—I’m also shifting my perspective to a gentler way.

By Thomas S., Georgia, USA|2025-04-22T13:14:43-05:00April 10, 2025|Comments Off

Whose Victory Is It? Letting God Win Over Lust
Gallery
Whose Victory Is It? Letting God Win Over Lust

Whose Victory Is It? Letting God Win Over Lust

Courage isn’t fighting lust—it’s surrendering it to God. My name is Steve, and I’m a recovering sexaholic. By God’s grace, sponsorship, and the Program, I’ve been sober since August 20, 2013. I haven’t had sex with myself or with anyone other than my spouse for over 11 years. I’ve also experienced some progressive victory over lust.

By Steve R., North Platte, Nebraska, USA|2025-04-22T13:25:13-05:00April 10, 2025|Comments Off

I Always Find What I’m Looking For
Gallery
I Always Find What I’m Looking For

I Always Find What I’m Looking For

He kept relapsing until he changed what he was looking for. I’m a low-bottom drunk. I was in active addiction for almost forty years. I was finally dragged into the Program fourteen years ago. Now, I’ve been sober for two years and three months. You do the math.

By Jeff M., Long Island, New York, USA|2025-04-22T13:20:12-05:00April 10, 2025|Comments Off

It Wasn’t a Relapse
Gallery
It Wasn’t a Relapse

It Wasn’t a Relapse

We were in our meeting, led by a local fellow. During a moment of silence, we heard a crack. We didn’t know where the sound came from. Another crack followed, and then another. Slowly, one fellow sank to the floor. One of the legs of his plastic chair had completely broken, and he was now on the floor. We were all surprised, and then we burst out in laughter. I told him, “Relax, fellow—that doesn’t count as a relapse.”

By Oscar M., Bogota, Colombia|2025-04-22T13:16:27-05:00April 10, 2025|Comments Off

webmaster

About webmaster

In My Sober Life

Images of Recovery

SA CFC 2

SA CFC 1

Editor’s Corner

Dear ESSAY

Offering Instead of Only Asking God for Help

Whose Victory Is It? Letting God Win Over Lust

I Always Find What I’m Looking For

It Wasn’t a Relapse

Get in touch

Legal

Contributions