It all started over nine years ago but that story is for another day. Fast forward to about one year ago. Let’s say from the start that this whole story was inspired by an Amazing Loving Higher power. Three members of the Australian Newcastle Monday night Beginners Group formed a SA Prison Committee.
The very first 100% online SA/S-Anon International Convention took place from Jan 22 till 24 and was an incredible event gathering fellows from all over the world. There were 955 SA registrants, and 685 S-Anons and 12 S-Ateens, which makes it the biggest IC in our SA history!
None of us can carry the pain of finality of letting go alone. That’s why we are here. Lean on us. The best advice a guy gave me in a meeting one day was, “Be a burden.”
Once a beachhead is established, defeat of the enemy is inevitable. Even if the first sallies out of the beachhead meet with stiff resistance and are driven back, it doesn’t matter; once a beachhead is established, enemy collapse is assured.
Recently, I have been attending meetings where the readings were taken from our Recovery Continues book. In one meeting, we read: “Lust is a function of my ego, just as resentment is. I, the lord of my life—lord over that lust object and over that resentment object—unleash a spiritual force against them both, against their wills, perverting the reality of their person to suit my twisted need. What is that negative connection? Why must I keep on making it? So I won’t have to look at myself.” (RC 43)
I have been struggling with my 9th Step for almost a year now due to Covid and all that not being able to travel freely. But in the past two months at the encouragement of my sponsor I have discovered writing letters like this and have found much freedom in them:
Thank you for your time, Art. Could we start by asking how old you were when you joined SA and the length of your sobriety? I was 44. I’m 80 now, with 35 years of sobriety. When asked how does one stay sober for 35 years, I say: “One day at a time, keep surrendering lust, and one day at a time, don’t die!” I’ve been blessed with the gift of sobriety and with longevity.
I grew up in a dysfunctional home with all types of abuse. My father was a workaholic and my mother was codependent. At the age of 4 or 5 I was subjected to sexual abuse by a female member of my household. The abuse continued for some years and totally altered my life. Something inside me closed up and I knew instinctively that this had to stay a secret.
I had a pretty normal childhood and, thankfully, I experienced no sexual traumas. Looking back, I notice that I had an unusually strong interest in women, even as a child. Still, I don’t believe I experienced genuine addiction until decades later.
I was born in 1989 in Kurdistan, Iran, in a family with 3 older brothers and no sisters. The concept of women and girls was always a mystery to me. The only female that I had a real connection with was my mother. That was not my only challenge though.
