Detachment was the path that led him to a break from the unreal and to seek what was real. Without a doubt, my program is one of progress, not perfection. It has taken me some years to understand how infatuation has kept me bound to lust. Infatuation, I believe, is a distortion of reality. What begins in me as a natural response, appreciating what is attractive in another person, slides out of reality and into the realm of fantasy.
Surrendering her life to God through the steps I am single in SA. And I am content. How is that possible? It is possible because I feel content each day as I surrender to my Higher Power's care. I don't look into the future about what that means. My focus is on today.
Hearing others share from their weakness helped him realize he was not alone. Hi, I’m Justin, I'm a grateful recovering sexaholic. I came to SA in 2019 when a priest friend introduced me to the Fellowship. I had just started a new job and it was summertime. He invited me to a meeting, gave me the SA White Book, and encouraged me to attend. At that first meeting, I heard other men share openly about their struggles—not just with masturbation and pornography, but with lust itself. I immediately felt connected. For the first time, I realized I wasn’t alone.
Good service leadership at all levels is indispensable for our future functioning and safety. I began service in SA to practice leadership based on the principles and values I am learning from our 12-Step program and to learn a new sober way of life and functioning in the world. SA service means I am too focused on helping sexaholics find the Program and affirming them in their recovery.
Having had a spiritual experience has allowed her to accept the plans God has for her personal life. Sitting in the counselor's office in early 2020, I voiced my biggest fear: that one day my sexual behavior would destroy a marriage.
Learning how to surrender and open up to healthy activities affirmed that he belonged. My name is Ryan, and I am a child of my Higher Power. As a former SA sponsor once humorously suggested, “You qualify to be in the program, you are one of us!”
Sobriety has helped him deal with the highs and lows of being single. I am single. I am not always happy, joyous, and free. It can be lonely. Divorce is painful. I don't feel happy, joyous, and free.
This period of being single has given him time to work a rigorous program. For most of my life, I’ve been looking for someone to connect with me and make me whole. I felt “inadequate, unworthy, alone, and afraid” (SA 203), always comparing my insides to the outsides of others. I was terrified of people seeing me for fear that they’d reject me—which was why I never learned to date. It felt too risky.
Recovery radically changed how he celebrates Father’s Day. I used to think Father’s Day was about waiting for my children to shower me with drawings, or words that would make me feel like a good father. I thought it was a day to sit back and receive—to be told that all my sacrifices were noticed, my sleepless nights appreciated, my worrying understood.
This tool helps him to release the past. There are moments in life when the past will not let go. I’ve started the path of recovery, made amends where I could, committed to change, and yet — the memories remain. The images return. The shame lingers. While I’ve begun to move forward on the outside, my mind is still caught in the painful echoes of what I've done. This is where the Prayer of Divine Remembrance comes in.
