A Fond Remembrance of My Good Friend Roy K.
I would like to share my memories of Roy K., who was perhaps second only to my father in influencing my life for the better.
Expressions of Gratitude
During the July 2009 meeting of the General Delegate Assembly (GDA) in Denver, two special letters were read.
Fishing
When I first came into SA, wrote my Step 0, and came to meetings, I knew what I had to do. I deleted the phone numbers of three guys I had acted out with. I closed down my Instant Messenger program and removed the program from my computer.
My Best Thinking
As I was reading Step Into Action, I was reminded of the phrase “My best thinking has gotten me to where I am today!” I started thinking about “my best thinking” prior to recovery and realized that my thinking had been all about me.
Surrender
What a life. Great job. Tons of friends and a loving family. Oh, did I mention that I’m insane? Clueless and selfishly delusional, I spent years wreaking havoc on others while projecting the image of Superman. In early 2007, my addiction to Internet pornography landed me in jail.
The Pain of Lust
It’s hard to say exactly when and how I became a sexaholic. At age 10 or 11, I was given a pocket calendar with a picture of a naked woman on it (I was so deeply impressed that today I can still remember the calendar). After that I would often go to the market in my neighborhood looking around for more “sexy calendars” hanging on the walls of the stalls.
The Gift of Sobriety
Today I know that I’m not in charge of my life. I know that there is a God, and that I owe my continued sobriety to my relationship with Him. But it has taken me a long time to learn those lessons, and I’m still learning them today.
What is the Intergroup and Why Should I Care?
Fifteen months ago I volunteered to serve as Chair of Denver’s Intergroup. I didn’t particularly want to do it. I’m not very good at schedules, and it meant showing up at a specific time and place once a month for two years. Nobody else was stepping up, however, so I decided to give it my best shot. So far I’ve missed two meetings.
Withdrawal
I had never thought of myself as unstable, nor ever noticed anything particularly erratic about myself until about three weeks after I got sober. My first several meetings were somewhat numb experiences.
Vigilance
As is often the case, I was desperate when I crept in to my first SA meeting at the end of December in 2007. I was desperate for so much then: sobriety, recovery, a hug from my daughter, a night without tears, a glimmer of hope from my wife. Desperation became my buzzword.
