Paradoxes of Recovery
A paradox is a statement that apparently contradicts itself and might be true. “When we surrender our ‘freedom,’ we become truly free” (SA 81).
Recovering Female Sex Addict
I left home at 21 and moved in with my boyfriend. I had been attending college full-time and had two part-time jobs, but I dropped out of school and work so I could spend more time acting out sexually. I felt a lot of shame, so I convinced my boyfriend to marry me. Sometimes we acted out by watching porn. When my husband wasn’t home, I would look at the porn and masturbate. We were both sex addicts, and we raged at each other daily. Lust killed our relationship.
Hope for Freedom
One of the greatest gifts in recovery for me has been the realized hope for freedom. I say “greatest,” because I didn’t believe it was possible for me to have freedom from the obsessions and compulsions of my addiction. As an addict I am powerless over lust, so what hope could I have? As I sat in meetings in the earlier years, most of us were still showing up week after week to report on our latest acting out episodes.
Planting New Meetings
I had an idea in my head. My idea was to plant meetings around Scotland. I thought even if it doesn’t help many SAs in Scotland it would probably help keep me sober. I am grateful that I have been sober from lust since December 2008.
South American Outreach
On Tuesday December 5th, veteran SA member Dave (27 years sober) arrived in Colombia to share with us his experience, strength and hope. On December 6th he accompanied us to the noon and afternoon meetings, where there was a combined attendance of close to 15 members. On the next day we went to a drug-addiction treatment center, where Dave shared his experience with 9 psychologists and close to 20 addicts.
The Hand of SA in the Americas
“Must be nice to go to all those places and have them pay.” I do hear that said from time to time. First, let me say that I get more out of speaking places than anyone else. I love the chance to share my Experience, Strength, and Hope with others.
Move the Feet!
For sexaholics one of the most difficult parts of recovery is that our program is so simple. We have the Steps suggested as a program of recovery and we are told to ask God’s protection and care with complete abandon. Our recovery goal is equally simple: we have a spiritual awakening as the result of these Steps.
Steps 1, 2, 3
Once every week an SA member calls to read to me the First, Second and Third Steps as a kind of surrender prayer. When I listen to him it brings me back to the basics of the program in these Steps. It could be changed depending on the person giving these Steps. Here is what he reads to me when he calls:
My Life in Recovery
On July 3rd, 2004, I left a family holiday party early to go to my first meeting. I even changed from shorts to long pants as I knew shorts were not supposed to be worn at meetings. My family assumed I was going to a church meeting, and I did nothing to correct them.
WhatsApp & SA
My name is Peter and I am a sexaholic, addicted to lust. I am so grateful for technology, I thank God regularly for allowing me to be lust free when using it. In my disease I used the computer and telephone to enhance my acting out. It allowed me to live in a fantasy world.
