Sponsor by mail helped him to address what was buried and oozing out. All my life, I looked like I had it together—married, seven children, active in serving others, and a belief in a Higher Power. But for 27 years, I lived a double life, trapped in pornography and secrets.
Finding a Higher Power through the Steps made him a kinder person. I’ve been incarcerated for over four years now, and I will spend 13 more years in prison because I let my sex addiction take over my life.
For most of his life, he lived in a prison built with shame, secrets, and addiction. Working the Steps with an accountability partner in prison and with the help of his sponsor by phone, he connected with God.
For most of his life, he lived in a prison built with shame, secrets, and addiction. Working the Steps with an accountability partner in prison and with the help of his sponsor by phone, he connected with God.
It Changed Both of Us Step Five had a lasting impact on both sponsor and sponsee through the Sponsor-by-Mail program.
How the semicolon etched into his skin saved him from ending his life. Bang! Bang! Bang! “Police! We have a search warrant!” It happened when I was 52, in the third decade of my marriage and teaching career. I carried with me lies and a lust-filled lens on life. Throughout my life, I had crossed so many lines that I had fried my moral compass, which led to a continuation of my sick habits. However, the moment I heard the banging on my door at 6:00 a.m., and an officer announcing “search warrant,” I knew that my fried moral compass had just exploded in my face. I wasn’t surprised, but I was devastated and relieved.
This period in his life has given him time to grow. Hi, I'm James D., and I’ve been incarcerated since January 28, 2022. I’ve been sexually sober since November 29, 2023—one year, ten months, and one day from the worst day of my life. That day, I experienced the first of many of the best days of my life: the day I entered sobriety.
Sponsorship in Prison My name is Blue, and I am an incarcerated person serving a life sentence in the California Department of Corrections and Rehabilitation for the crimes of sexual assault. This is the bad news. The good news is that coming to prison was the best thing that could have happened for me, because it forced me to take an honest look at myself and what I needed to do to transform and be healed.
Even when cut off from the world, you’re never cut off from recovery. A few years ago, I wrote an article about my experience sponsoring incarcerated fellows by mail. How different it is now to be one of them! As if I needed further proof that I’m just another “bozo on the bus”!
How a sponsor changed my life All my life I went to church, served others, and believed in a higher power. I am married with seven children. However, I lived a secret life of pornography addiction for 27 years. I had a lot of trauma I did not know how to deal with after being abused as a child several times by four different men while growing up. My pornography use eventually led to a crime that put me in prison for four years.
