…I enjoyed last week’s meeting and appreciated your sharing. I reflected afterwards on how I reached bottom and how I knew I was having a problem. I believed I was fighting against nature. I started to believe I would lose my battle. I have full belief in the nature of things. I do not like artificial stimulants, birth control, etc. I believe happiness is going with nature and that we have everything we need without intervention. This belief came from my experience with alcohol, AA, and especially from the Church. I was desperately seeking information about sexuality and sexual orientation. The Church said homosexuality was not right and that it was against nature. I wanted to believe this and I fought within myself to believe this. I was getting very little evidence to support this idea and society is saying that the Church is wrong and that a certain percentage of people are sexually oriented to the same sex. I was losing my fight and I in turn started to doubt the Church. I needed the Church for spiritual growth as well and I needed to have complete faith in the Church. My addiction was progressing so my belief system was falling apart and full of doubts. How happy I was to find SA. It supplied me with the support and evidence I needed to regain my belief in the Church and its teachings. I can now practice chastity and reorient myself toward my true sexuality and with God.

Getting caught was another big fear I had. As I was saying before, my addiction was progressing and my acting out was getting worse. If I wasn’t physically acting out, I was day-dreaming or living in fantasy. The distance between my wife and I was getting bigger. I was scared that my addiction was going to be discovered. That fear is still there to a certain degree—probably because I lived with it so long.

I have restored my faith in God, Church, and nature—the birth of Christ. God supplied me once again with everything I need to go on and find serenity. He even gave me SA and friends for support.

I wanted all people at your office to know of my release from prison. I couldn’t have made it without all of your support. Your correspondence and encouragement made me feel that I was not the complete crazy person in the world that some of the world had painted me.…