Thank you for your program. It is like the lyrics of the song “Amazing Grace.” SA is what has saved me, but I wish I could have found it sooner. I molested my first child at the age of 21 and am now 41. Usually it has just been touching but the things I did to my step-daughter are horrendous. I always prayed for God to stop that behavior, but I didn’t realize how messed up my whole sexual life was until I found SA and found that I needed to stop it all, not just part.
…I am a high-bottom alcoholic and a low-bottom drunk … sexually sober for 14 months. I am eternally grateful … to SA, and to God for my new lease on life. I have received many blessings throughout my life, but my sexual sobriety is the most precious.…
“Some will be willing to term themselves ‘problem drinkers,’ but cannot endure the suggestion that they are in fact mentally ill. They are abetted in this blindness by a world which does not understand the difference between sane drinking and alcoholism.” (Twelve Steps and Twelve Traditions, page 33.) I believe these words apply more to me, the sexaholic, than to me, the alcoholic. I first heard these words in AA—I realized I was an alcoholic before I knew I was a sexaholic—but in sobriety I found it difficult to believe I was mentally ill.
Shortly after I entered SA in August 1988, some fellow sexaholics mentioned making a “daily contract” for sobriety. During the first few weeks of sobriety, I hardly needed a contract. I was so scared and miserable that sobriety was my only option. My second marriage was near an end, my acting out would cause me to quickly lose my job and I simply felt hopeless.
SA is growing on LI. We have 3 strong meetings in Seaford on Monday, Thursday evenings and Saturday morning. Over the last two months, many newcomers have been showing up, bringing our meetings to about 20 members each. Though sobriety is difficult, there are some true miracles here, thanks to the grace of God and a strong fellowship.
In April of 1990, this Wednesday noon group meeting almost died. Only two of us were attending and the church in which we met was locked most Wednesdays. We decided to move the meeting and now we have 10 to 12 every week with about 20 to 25 that come when they can.
We have about 7 to 8 regular members at the Laguna Niguel group. The meeting includes a lot of honesty, openness and caring. Much learning and recovery is taking place. We send our best to all involved in the SA program of recovery.
We are delayed in answering our group correspondence. We walk slowly, but we’re united in our purpose. Our unique group in Rio de Janeiro has six assiduous members. Others come a couple of times and disappear. Our recovery is slow, but we’re united, having always in our mind the desire to be well.
Our meetings are still small. Usually it’s me and someone else. I’ve been in contact with people around the country, but probably not as much as I should be. We’ve started to have monthly business meetings, too. It feels good to be sober, and the program works if I put it into action.
SA is alive in Albuquerque with four meetings per week and about 20 to 30 participating members. A few members have more than two years and several have a year of sexual sobriety. In summer 1990, the four groups and particularly newcomers to all the groups found they did not know who attended the other meetings, where collections went, who ran the phone line, P.O. Box or Central Office contacts.
