Discussion Topic
The author of this article describes how he came into the rooms of SA in 1999 with the purpose of getting his life back into order—but not to change.
Dear ESSAY
In response to the previous ESSAY edition, I wanted to share the following. I once asked Roy K. what he boiled recovery down to. He answered without hesitating, looking me right in the eye. "Stay sober, work your steps, and watch what God does."
Coming Next
Men and Women in SA NEXT EDITION—The June issue will be on the brave men and women working together on their common solution in the fellowship of Sexaholics Anonymous.
SA CFC
I have been addicted to lust since the age of 14. I was in therapy twice, but I never spoke the truth. I have had several miracle experiences in my life (one really BIG) with my Higher Power, but my HP was judgmental and I feared admitting my addiction to anyone. I tried the white-knuckle method once each year by ridding the computer of porn stash, but I didn’t stop the fantasy and sex with self every day.
Prison Work in Slovakia
The Program of Sexaholic Anonymous is still not available in most of the prisons around the world and in Europe. My addiction made me a prisoner of lust. It was horrible and I was thinking that I threw my life out the window in the pursuit of lust. I can not imagine how hard it must be being prisoner of lust and being a real prisoner at the same time.
Change as an Action
We hear a great deal about change in the fellowship. Our Serenity Prayer talks of having the “courage to change.” In our early days, sober members talk to us about having the “willingness” to change. But what exactly is change, as it relates to the fellowship and sobriety?
Willingness to Change
I arrived in SA in 1999 under dire circumstances following a long period of compulsive poor behavior involving few other people but leaving devastation within my own family. I did not discover the extent of the devastation until many years later after engaging in the SA program wholeheartedly.
Letting Go of Victimhood
I came to Sexaholics Anonymous 4 years ago. Before that I had no idea I was an addict. Daily suicidal thoughts were the last straw. After acting out I didn’t feel good; I just felt strong pain and had no idea what to do or how I could help myself. I was praying that God would give me the way out from my obsession.
My Inner Civil War
When I was new to the Fellowship, I heard something that made me laugh: “I’m a self-loathing narcissist.” I thought it was funny, but I also wanted to cry at how true this statement was for me. I’m a sexaholic and have truly earned my seat in these SA rooms. I have a fatal, incurable, progressive disease—a real soul sickness. By an incomprehensible miracle, the Program helped me find my way to a Higher Power who restored me to sanity. Granted, all I have is a daily reprieve contingent on my spiritual condition, but that much is an absolute miracle to me.
Change Your Ways or We’re Finished
I am Lina, SA, sober since 2010, Mexico City. I was born in 1968. I only stopped taking a bottle when I was 6 years old. As a result, I was the subject of mockery at home. I remember my house made of tin, and a dirt floor; we had scarce resources and many financial needs. I was the last of 8 siblings in addition to being a girl with a stomach disease.
