Over the weekend of April 25-27, the third Australian SA Conference was held in Yackandandah, Victoria. With 24 members attending from various parts of Australia, this was the largest conference so far, and we are growing slowly in numbers and sobriety.
When I was a small boy of three or four years of age, I was the first to go to bed. I used to hide my head under the pillow and dream about women of beaming beauty. There wasn’t anything explicitly sexual, but I fused with them. I remember at that age walking with a two-year-old girl and immediately getting a weird feeling of being “connected” to nature and the whole universe — and being afraid of that small creature.
The following information comes from the meetings of the SA Board of Trustees, the General Delegate Assembly, and the SA Business Meeting (called “SA Today” at the conference; audio tape of the same name available from Glenn K Audio Tapes):
Invariably I find Essay to be a very helpful series of personal sharings. In the last issue [Dec. 96], the article, “How I Deal with Romantic Lust” was one that helped me considerably. J.R., who wrote it, made an excellent contribution to the basic understanding of our deadly disease.
Many of our members tell us that it was several months before they became aware of the Essay. Once a person finds the Essay’s inspirational articles and heartwarming stories of recovery, that person is likely to subscribe and become a regular reader.
I have been concerned about a policy of our international conferences and feel a need to address this in a forum permitting the greatest participation possible. That issue is the prohibition of children from any official gathering at the conferences, a policy that has been in place for the past two years.
At the most recent Convention in Oklahoma City, the SA General Delegate Assembly elected four non-sexaholic professionals to the SA Board of Trustees. Each of the four nominations was approved unanimously by the General Delegate Assembly and the Board of Trustees. They will serve staggered terms as the historic first non-sexaholic trustees and are eligible for re-election. Following is some biographical data on the new trustees and written responses to the Board’s questions.
I never knew I was a sexaholic. In the six weeks between the time I heard of Sexaholics Anonymous and my first meeting, I did a lot of honest soul-searching. I was working the program in AA and considered myself safe from the dangers of other addictions. I wavered between ignorance of my sexaholism and denial of what I did know. Denial was my first reaction to everything.
I am completely powerless over pornography of all kinds on the Internet. This includes pictures and words. Something inside of me cries out against making this admission, even now. I don’t want to give up my independence. I want to believe that I can control and enjoy it. I want to believe that I can get on the Internet and not go to the wrong sites. I want to believe that I can have the Internet on my computer and not use it to go to the pornographic sites, but it is not true.
My addiction had reared its ugly head in many ways over a long period of time. Before sobriety I could look back on over 40 years of living the addict’s secret. The only bottom line I would dare claim is what I did not do in acting out. Moments of honesty about my addiction make me ask why I did not do what was left undone. Fear of being seen created a pseudo bottom line.
