Dear Essay, I was so grateful when I saw the August magazine titled “Supporting Women in SA.” Topics such as getting a sponsor, working the steps, mixed meetings, boundaries, service, and participating in the fellowship reminded me of my journey to recovery.
My sponsor defined “insight” as having an understanding of my behaviors. So, to me, having an understanding of why I am addicted to lust and sex has been a huge eye-opener.
Dear Essay readers, As we considered our options for the “old-timers” theme of this edition, we looked firstly at limiting ourselves to articles from members with 30+ years’ sobriety—all but one of these would be from the US, but thought this too narrow. Therefore, we decided to broaden the review, taking articles from members who are not simply sober for years, but that each of them would have either the longest sobriety or be a pioneer in his/her country.
Iranian old-timer Masoud describes in great detail how he has been working his program since the beginning of his recovery to improve his conscious contact with the God of his understanding.
The last weekend of August was one of the most unforgettable events in my life, when 48 SA and 9 S-Anon members gathered in Stirling for the Scottish SA Convention. Fellows from the UK, Italy, Spain, Germany, Ireland and Netherlands joined us in doing together what we cannot do alone.
I am Harvey A. My sobriety date is March 8, 1984. I can hardly believe that I am now 81 years old and have been sexually sober for more than 37 years.
I came into SA on February 26, 1999 and by the grace of God and numerous miracles have stayed physically sexually sober since that day. SA did not emerge in Australia until about 1988 in Wentworthville, Sydney and a group in Melbourne that initially met on a park bench. All of the original founding members had ties to AA but have now passed away or left the program.
I came to my first SA meeting in Karlsruhe, Germany, on Sunday, May 26, 1985. I was one of three newcomers at a meeting of 20 men and women. As newcomers we were required to give a brief First Step in the form of answering set questions. Before I came to the meeting, I threw out my pornography. I also threw out phone numbers and addresses of women I knew from other 12-Step fellowships. I stopped acting out sexually.
Once I was in the parking lot of a shopping center, when I was approached by a pretty young woman who had worked as a waitress in a restaurant that I used to go to. Nothing unusual about that. Any time I was in the restaurant she simply took my order. But now, she told me she had lost her job and, stuck for money, said she would supply “whatever I wanted.”
Sobriety began for me in Nashville in May 1986. We were a small band of six or seven persons meeting once per week trying to avoid the terrible consequences of our acting out.
