My Higher Power Showed Me Humility With a Flower
I had the opportunity to serve on a Friday night last February at an event that I had wanted to serve at for five years, but before never had felt ready to serve because of my addiction.
Learning From a Hedgehog
During the Covid pandemic, I returned to Ireland after many years teaching in Asia. I spent two weeks living in quarantine in a remote cottage in the countryside. I used to join the daily mid-day Irish SA phone meetings which helped me to stay sober one day at a time.
Dear ESSAY
Dear Essay, Part of me is a grateful recovering sexaholic. God has kept me sober since 12/17/17, and all I have is today. My sponsor suggested I write this letter, and it’s a great opportunity to reflect on my recovery and God’s work in my life. I am convinced that any success I’ve enjoyed is due to God. The Third Step Prayer says “please take away my difficulties that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy power, Thy love and Thy way of life”. My hope and prayer is that the letter bears witness to God and his ability to bring beauty from ashes.
Editor’s Corner
Isn’t it ironic: in our disease, we had no choice but to act out; we simply had to; but in recovery, our hearts change and we have no choice but to reach out—we simply have to. Everyone who gets sober, who begins to experience the fruits of recovery wants, as a natural consequence, to help others get sober, especially newcomers.
SA CFC
It has been very important for me to complete my SA Twelve Step work with my sponsor. It has been equally important to keep all SA letters and worksheets to show to my parole board that I have been taking actions to get better. They have been looking to see whether I am sober from my active addiction, and have a post-release support group.
Discussion Topic
Kawy shares in the article “Helping Others By Showing Up” how her way of helping newcomers to stay in SA is by sponsoring some, showing up, and being there for them in different ways.
What’s Going On in SA
It fills me with awe to write this ESSAY column each issue. Who would have thought, when this sexaholic entered a meeting many years ago, that my experience and recovery could help so many? I get to share with you all the marvelous things that contribute to international recovery all over the world.
Praying Outside of the House
One of the practical tools I have found most helpful in recovery, particularly as a method of working step 11, has been setting aside time to pray outside of my house during the day. I have worked remotely since the start of COVID lockdowns in 2020, so I am often able to get away, doing so to houses of worship nearby my home. I have also done so in parks, airport chapels, or in lobbies or waiting rooms when out and about.
Using the Tools Shifted Her Vision
I received some news about my health that I was not quite ready for. It meant multiple trips to the doctor and waiting on test results. Waiting has never been a strong suit of mine. I found myself wrestling with fear, for as a sex addict, fear can be quite triggering. Fear is the spark that, if not surrendered to my Higher Power, can start a forest fire of bad decisions.
The Power of an Explosive New Affection
A few years ago, I read a book, the theme of which was hiding from love. When I entered SA, I discovered—like many addicts—that I had been hiding from love my whole life. For me that’s seventy years which is no short time. A friend in SA who means a lot to me, shared that he too was hiding from love, but that God was working powerfully in his life to change him from the inside out. Slowly, a new desire for real loving connection with people began replacing his old tendency to keep away from people.
