I came into SA two years ago, when I was released from prison after serving four years for indecent exposure. I had been out on parole for a year and had been sober for seven months when I was questioned by a detective for a crime I committed 10 years before.
The Twelve and Twelve says that “... only through utter defeat are we able to take our first steps toward liberation and strength” (21). This is the story of how I came to be utterly defeated, and how that defeat led to liberation for me.
By the time I had sense enough to feel ashamed of my acting out, the allure of lust had its hooks in my mind and heart. As a young child, I became lost in my own private hell: trying to navigate right from wrong, discovering family secrets and keeping my own, and experiencing a growing desire for pleasure.
I am happy to report that the CFC now has approximately $8,000 in named reserve, mostly as a result of the Pennsylvania prison news (see December 2010 ESSAY). This is more than enough money to cover starter kits for all Pennsylvania prisons, so we would like to send White Books to prison libraries throughout the country.
In the San Francisco Bay area, we started a Friday SA group with the purpose of interacting with prisoners who are part of the local sponsor-by-mail program. We wanted to create a different kind of meeting from our usual White Book “read and share” meetings—a meeting that would establish bonds between SA members in prison and those of us on the outside.
My friend Chris began his recovery from sexual addiction after being arrested in 2007 for a sex-related crime. In 2008, shortly after celebrating one year of sexual sobriety, he learned that he could plead guilty and receive a 15-year sentence, or he could go to trial.
In August 2010, a prison psychologist in Mercer, PA contacted SAICO to inquire about SA’s support for prisoners, and I responded to the inquiry. The psychologist informed me that the prison administration for the State of Pennsylvania has mandated that all 27 prisons implement Twelve Step recovery programs for sexual addiction.
The CFC met during the convention in Chicago in July to discuss our committee’s purpose, goals, and methods. Our primary purpose is to support prisoners, staff, and their families. Approximately 20 meetings are held in prisons in 10 states.
A member of our group (I’ll call him Billy) has been incarcerated for several years due to his sexaholism. He has developed a beautiful spirit while in prison, and shares with us regularly by mail. In a recent letter he said, “Doing time is not that bad if you focus on building a relationship with God and not get caught up in the junk that goes on here. It’s only by God’s grace that I’ve been able to get through this.”
Do you know an SA member who is likely to be incarcerated soon? Would you like to help that member prepare for the experience? The CFC offers support to incarcerated members in a variety of ways, including sending complimentary SA Literature as requested, offering a Sponsor-by-Mail program, helping members start meetings in prison, and providing parolees with SA contacts.
