Incarceration can easily trigger guilt, shame, remorse, fear, loneliness, and negative feelings like anger and resentment towards oneself and others. Knowing how to handle such feelings, whether inside prison gates or on the outside, can free a person.
I was introduced to SA by another inmate. Initial contact from the SA sponsor team was very helpful. I am now working with my sponsor—brother and friend—who was assigned to me earlier this year. SA has changed my life. Since joining, I thank God both for SA and for those behind the scenes who, along with my Higher Power, are helping me stay sober.
My name is Jared and I’m a grateful, recovering sexaholic. I was arrested on the night of Dec 7, 2018. I plead guilty to inappropriate conduct with a minor and was sentenced to 32 1/2 years, 7 1/2 of which are fixed.
Twenty-five years ago, I was working as a procurement clerk and was made to give a tour to some clients to whom I had sent hundreds of thousands of dollars worth of proposals over the years. I had spoken with the salespeople by phone. I felt like I knew them.
I have been involved in SA since June 2007. Over the years I have tremendously enjoyed our worldwide magazine Essay, the “meeting in print.”
On my way home to join a Zoom meeting I stopped by my mailbox. I have a subscription to a golf magazine, and this particular issue had two beautiful professional women golfers on the cover, which meant it would be full of photos of them.
Why is sobriety not something easy to grasp? Because it is very simple! Much has been said and tried to improve the sobriety of sexaholics; however, I cannot find a more efficient way than doing the following:
A thought struck me today. Each time I lust or form a resentment, I am trying to hold onto something that is not mine to hold. With lust I am taking the image of the person which prevents me from actually seeing them as a person. With resentments, I am holding onto their defects, which are normally my defects, again preventing me from seeing the person in front of me.
Earlier today, my family and I had to put our 11-year-old dog Cody down due to complications following cancer and other assorted and cumulative ailments. He was blind and had recently lost his hearing and his teeth. He had become increasingly lame, irritable, discontent and restless—boy, do I relate to those character defects.
There are, as we know, precisely twelve Steps; but there are countless recovery sayings—“Keep It Simple,” “One Day At A Time,” and “First Things First,” being just a few of the most popular slogans.
