SA CFC
No one as a child growing up ever thinks they might one day end up in jail or as a sexaholic. Yet, that’s what happened to me. I am a female sexaholic, sober since January 19, 2020.
Editor’s Corner
Dear Essay readers, I was asked to introduce this special edition, as I had the wonderful privilege to chair last May’s worldwide online event “Supporting Women in SA.” You may have wondered why it is necessary to support women in SA or thought it is an outside issue or a controversial topic. Well, then this issue of Essay is for you.
Working the Steps in Order to Dissolve My Spiritual Clots
I brought a friend into the program, and encouraged her to feel free to share anything with her sponsor. She said, “Anything?” And I answered, “Yes, anything and everything.” Then I shared more of my experience, strength, and hope with her. She asked if I could be her sponsor.
Step Four Helped Me to Face My Wild Elephant
Lust corrupted my childhood. I was violated when I was very young—an inappropriate act that distorted my perception of sexuality, reality, and love. For years afterward I went around with an aching, infinite emptiness inside me. I bandaged the pain with a blindfold and contented myself to live in darkness, like someone living down a deep water well.
Serving Others Has Brought So Much Joy
As a pre-school age child, I learned how to use a vibrator as a sex toy. That’s how it all began. I had never heard the word “sex” and knew nothing of sexual intimacy. But I knew what felt good, and was immediately hooked.
The Promises Are Real
I was exposed to men’s magazines at the age of seven and didn’t realize it was abuse. At the age of nine, I was sexually abused by another girl, who was 10, and experienced a lot of confusion. The confusion increased when I was sort of forcibly converted to Catholicism at the age of 11, which led to a whole load of guilt.
These Years Have Been So Much Fun
My name is Sylvia and I am a grateful recovering sexaholic. I was a lonely child. I was a daydreamer. I was never present. Growing up people would tell me things I wouldn’t hear because I was always off in my head somewhere.
It Took Sobriety to Hear the Birds Singing
Imagine a little girl lost inside a book, playing the piano and always alone but feeling safe. Her world brought her happiness. What was happening around her? Sometimes being in the moment it felt too full of other’s expectations, never fitting in, always different from what she saw on the outsides of others.
Today She Chooses Life and Love
I am a recovering sex addict from Ukraine, sober since the fall of 2015. I am completely unable to cope with lust, which manifests itself in objectification, fantasies, and an unhealthy obsession with one person or a group of people. I have lost control of my thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Her Fellow Members Loved Her Until She Was Able to Love Herself
For somebody who related to the reading "The Invisible Monster" in our book Recovery Continues, it is a miracle that I can share something on “Practicing Healthy Interactions in SA” today. I think the key word for me is “practice” as I will never be perfect and it is progress not perfection.
