Discussion Topic
Hamed describes how he wasn’t making enough use of the tools, hadn’t told everything, didn’t really work the Steps, had his own interpretation of the sobriety definition, etc.
Editors’ Corner
Dear Essay readers, Our Fellowship continues to attract more and more young people from all over the world—men and women who learn from the experience of those who have gone before them and do not have to descend so deep in the bottomless abyss of the addiction. You can devour their stories under the heading “Young & Sober in SA.”
Staying Sober in My Twenties Has Its Own Challenges
I was born in 1989 in Kurdistan, Iran, in a family with 3 older brothers and no sisters. The concept of women and girls was always a mystery to me. The only female that I had a real connection with was my mother. That was not my only challenge though.
I Had the “Textbook,” but in SA I Found the “Workbook”
I am grateful for being a sexaholic and not being alone having this disease. A priest told me about SA when I was 26, I googled and read some member story’s and thought it was not so bad in my life. “I only had a problem with porno and masturbation. I didn’t cheat on my wife, I didn’t have sex with a prostitute, I didn’t have sex outside my marriage, ... After all, it was not so bad.” I thought I still could manage it on my own.
The Root Was Lust
Throughout my adolescence I was progressively consumed by same-sex behaviors and fantasies. I thought that the problem was being attracted to men. Acting out for 17 years shaped my whole thinking. “I was restless, irritable and discontented.” SA told me that actually the root was lust, and this was music to my ears. I began to detach from lust one day at a time and stopped carrying around my wound as a trophy.
Unlike The Older Members, I Was Brought Up With The Internet
I had just turned 21 when I entered the SA fellowship. I immediately knew SA was the program for me but I didn’t feel comfortable in the local fellowship since everyone else was at least twice my age.
Fully Accepting SA When Young Was God’s Gift
I found SA shortly after I turned 28 years old. I heard an old-timer once on a tape say that he didn’t know why anyone under 30 would come to SA—they still had decades of good lusting left!
Are You Really Sure You Are a Sexaholic?
My name is José and I am a recovering sexaholic. I am only 25 years old and I joined SA when I was 19. Many ask me how I joined the fellowship so young and if I was really sure that I was a sexaholic. And my answer is always, “The fact that masturbation and lustful thoughts made me suffer so much and I wasn’t able to get out of it, said enough about my condition.”
I’m Surrounded By People With Longer Longer Experience Than Mine
Hi, I am a 20-year-old sexaholic from Poland. I was told about pornography on the internet by classmates about the age of 12, but didn’t get sucked in instantly. Around 13, I discovered masturbation, and then things started to get out of control.
I Joined SA As a 19-year-old Girl
My first memories are of fear, resentment and separation. Lust first came on the scene when I was four, my mother moved with us to a foreign country without my father. During my first few months in this new place I was sexually abused by kids several years older than myself. I was terrified anybody would find out, I was sure it was my fault and I felt guilty for enjoying the physical aspect and attention.
