How many times have I made that declaration? Hundreds, maybe thousands of times I have said those exact words. Recently I watched a TV survival show where 12 contestants were dumped in the ocean within swimming distance of various islands. They were required to write journals before and during the show. Everyone wrote some form of “I got this” at the beginning. During the course of the show, hunger, loneliness, sickness, or insects began driving them to leave the contest.

Then an interesting shift happened. The remaining castaways started writing in their journals wondering who else was stranded on the islands. Many started searching for other survivors. Castaways would find each other and pair up. Some found others, but still wanted to do it on their own. Those who paired up started writing in their journals “We got this!” After 49 days 5 survivors had all found each other. They combined resources, sharing encouragement, burdens and laughs together. They knew they could do together what none of them could do alone.

I am reminded of the second paragraph of page 17 of the Big Book, “There Is A Solution.” “We are average Americans. All sections of this country and many of its occupations are represented… We are people who normally would not mix. But there exists among us a fellowship, a friendliness, and an understanding which is indescribably wonderful. We are like the passengers of a great liner the moment after rescue from shipwreck when camaraderie, joyousness and democracy pervade the vessel from steerage to Captain’s table.” What an apt description for us Sexaholics!

When Bill wrote the first draft of the Big Book he used “I” statements. What amazing insight to eventually change it from “I” to “We”! I have learned that in this new way of living I cannot do this on my own. It is a WE program not a ME program. When I isolate and try to do this on my own I have ALWAYS failed. I need everyone in this program. Oldtimers and newcomers all have something to teach me. We band together and help each other when we are struggling. We celebrate together when we reach milestones or pull another struggling addict from the relentless, beating waves of our addiction.

The lesson I learned from this TV show was amazingly spiritual. I was reminded I need everyone in my life to help me survive. The five remaining contestants not only survived together, they thrived. At one point they used garbage from the ocean to create a game of Skee-Ball, having fun together. The same thing happens for me at meetings when I share who I really am. We relate, we connect, we share. We all survive and thrive. We even find something to laugh about and we find the real joy in the fellowship. We are rescued!