I have a problem regarding what is my job and what is someone else’s in a relationship. I am a champion fixer. Recently I realized there are situations I cannot fix: the sponsee who is facing jail time. I didn’t cause it, can’t control it, and can’t cure it.
SA’s sobriety definition says “for the single sexaholic, sexual sobriety means freedom from sex of any kind.” It does not say that we endure the endless torture of chastity.
After my disclosure in 1988, my wife told me to get help or get out. I met with my pastor, went on a retreat, and started seeing a counselor who sent me to SA. I joined. Then my wife told our children that she was asking me to move out.
My fears cause me to make things bigger Than they are
My Dear Friend Lust: I am writing to you to finalize our relationship.
This is hard to explain unless you’ve experienced it. I don’t use willpower to fight my addiction anymore. I know the addiction is more powerful than I am, and I’ve declared it to be the winner. I still have to make the decision to not engage in lust, but I no longer fight it like I used to do.
A member wrote, “I’m looking for a miracle. I’ve been looking for a miracle for a long time. Recently I’ve thought that if I just work the Steps, I could then have the miracle I’ve been looking for.” Wow! This statement hit me pretty hard, because it reminded me so much of my own Step Two (which took something like five years for me to fully accomplish).
I recently heard a member express discouragement at reduced attendance, revolving-door membership, and a general lack of sobriety in the meetings he attends.
I’d like to thank a friend in the program who phoned me tonight, and I’d like to thank God for bringing our lives together. My friend and I have always connected by sharing who we are with each other; not who we should be, but who God created us to be.
The Rochester group would like to share our recent success following the adoption of a new Twelve Step group study format.
