My name is Abdelbarie, and I’m a sexaholic. Friends in America would pronounce my name Ab-del-BAH-ree, but to be honest, it’s the word “sexaholic” I’m still not used to. I never knew exactly what was wrong with me. I thought I was just a normal guy with a nasty porn and masturbation habit. As it turns out, I’m not normal at all.
My name is Dave, I’m a recovering sexaholic, and I’ve been sexually sober since August 1, 1985 by the grace of God and this wonderful Fellowship. I came into the Fellowship when I separated from my first wife hoping to save my marriage. After two years of sobriety, we still divorced, and by the grace of God, I knew absolutely that I had no business being in any kind of romantic relationship, much less a committed one.
I was unmarried when I entered SA at the age of 26. I got sober and stayed sober though several dates and relationships. I met my wife after 16 years of sobriety. I remained sober through our courtship and 12 years of marriage (so far).
After finishing my Step Four harms inventory, I was very grateful to notice that each consecutive person that I dated after I got sober had fewer harms. There are still things left to work on, but my ability to have healthy relationships has improved since joining SA. I'd like to describe some of the progress that I saw in my inventory.
I recently dated someone for three months. The first month was great, but by the second month, I felt like he was pulling back emotionally, and by the third month, we said our goodbyes.
There’s a great talk by Roy K. called “Sponsorship and Group Sobriety.” (If you are new to the Program, Roy K. was the founder of our Fellowship). In his talk, Roy K. shares about the highest purpose of sponsorship. It’s not to keep people coming to the Program, and it’s not to keep people sober, because only a Higher Power can do that. According to Roy, the highest purpose of sponsorship is not even working the Steps, although that is an integral part of it. He says that the highest purpose of sponsorship is introducing other men to the real Connection and bringing them into a way of living where the sponsee can experience having that real Connection.
In the early 1980s, the seeds of SA were sown in Germany, marking the beginning of a transformative journey for many sexaholics. This writing will tell of some pivotal moments and key players that shaped SA in Germany, highlighting its growth and impact.
Without my therapist telling me about SA, I might not be alive today. Wouldn’t it be wonderful if all helping professionals understood how effective SA can be?
I joined my home group in Amman, Jordan a year ago today. Back then there was 12 of us, and we had no in-person meeting. We participated remotely in meetings held in Egypt.
The XII Convention of Sexaholics Anonymous in Colombia In the peaceful town of Paipa, Boyacá, known for its hot springs and mountainous landscape, the XII Annual Convention of Sexaholics Anonymous was held last August. At the “Les Foyers de Charité” Retreat House, 42 men gathered under the theme “Hope for Freedom.” For three days, connection and recovery were the central focus of the event, where commitment to sobriety and hope guided every activity.
