I ask God, as I understand him, for the courage to change. When and how do I do this? Every time I pray the Serenity Prayer, that phrase is there. I have liked the Serenity Prayer ever since the beginning of my recovery. We pray it often, in group meetings, in workshops, and at retreats … It says profound things with simple words, but often I will get distracted and simply recite it automatically.
I am Oscar, a recovering sexaholic, sober by the grace of my beloved Higher Power since March 6, 2012.
How does one become an oldtimer? It is very simple. Stay sober one day at a time, and do not die. Everything else is detail.
I could not go on. I had to change. And one of the many promises of the 12-Step program is that I will change fundamentally, if I work the tools of the program.
I am convinced that the book Alcoholics Anonymous is correct when it says that “Selfishness—self-centeredness! That, we think, is the root of our troubles.” Selfishness is a spiritual malady, a spiritual problem rooted deeply in my being. I consider or evaluate everything by how it affects me. My fears are self-centered. A lot can be written about selfishness. It is enough to say that it is what causes my problems.
The topic of this edition matches the theme of the upcoming SA & S-Anon International Convention in July in Los Angeles: “Courage to Change.” Many men and women on the convention committee are serving tirelessly to make it an opportunity for you to continue your own change. All information on p. 30.
The author of this article describes how he came into the rooms of SA in 1999 with the purpose of getting his life back into order—but not to change.
In response to the previous ESSAY edition, I wanted to share the following. I once asked Roy K. what he boiled recovery down to. He answered without hesitating, looking me right in the eye. "Stay sober, work your steps, and watch what God does."
Men and Women in SA NEXT EDITION—The June issue will be on the brave men and women working together on their common solution in the fellowship of Sexaholics Anonymous.
I have been addicted to lust since the age of 14. I was in therapy twice, but I never spoke the truth. I have had several miracle experiences in my life (one really BIG) with my Higher Power, but my HP was judgmental and I feared admitting my addiction to anyone. I tried the white-knuckle method once each year by ridding the computer of porn stash, but I didn’t stop the fantasy and sex with self every day.
