I was born in 1989 in Kurdistan, Iran, in a family with 3 older brothers and no sisters. The concept of women and girls was always a mystery to me. The only female that I had a real connection with was my mother. That was not my only challenge though.
I am grateful for being a sexaholic and not being alone having this disease. A priest told me about SA when I was 26, I googled and read some member story’s and thought it was not so bad in my life. “I only had a problem with porno and masturbation. I didn’t cheat on my wife, I didn’t have sex with a prostitute, I didn’t have sex outside my marriage, ... After all, it was not so bad.” I thought I still could manage it on my own.
Throughout my adolescence I was progressively consumed by same-sex behaviors and fantasies. I thought that the problem was being attracted to men. Acting out for 17 years shaped my whole thinking. “I was restless, irritable and discontented.” SA told me that actually the root was lust, and this was music to my ears. I began to detach from lust one day at a time and stopped carrying around my wound as a trophy.
I had just turned 21 when I entered the SA fellowship. I immediately knew SA was the program for me but I didn’t feel comfortable in the local fellowship since everyone else was at least twice my age.
I found SA shortly after I turned 28 years old. I heard an old-timer once on a tape say that he didn’t know why anyone under 30 would come to SA—they still had decades of good lusting left!
My name is José and I am a recovering sexaholic. I am only 25 years old and I joined SA when I was 19. Many ask me how I joined the fellowship so young and if I was really sure that I was a sexaholic. And my answer is always, “The fact that masturbation and lustful thoughts made me suffer so much and I wasn’t able to get out of it, said enough about my condition.”
Hi, I am a 20-year-old sexaholic from Poland. I was told about pornography on the internet by classmates about the age of 12, but didn’t get sucked in instantly. Around 13, I discovered masturbation, and then things started to get out of control.
My first memories are of fear, resentment and separation. Lust first came on the scene when I was four, my mother moved with us to a foreign country without my father. During my first few months in this new place I was sexually abused by kids several years older than myself. I was terrified anybody would find out, I was sure it was my fault and I felt guilty for enjoying the physical aspect and attention.
My name is Mike and I’m a sexaholic, sober since June 3, 1984. I imagine coming into the program at the age of 28 or 29 today would be much different than it was when I joined in the mid-1980s. Today, depending on where a person begins their SA journey, a new member might join a group in which most of the members were substantially older than they and also be blessed with much long-term sobriety.
Young and sober? It sounds like two galaxies crashing together! I am sexually sober by the grace of God, yours and my sponsor’s help since October 7, 2015. I have heard people say “Some guys get the grace from God, others don’t.” I do not believe in this. In my opinion, everyone has the same chance for recovery—and my God is a fair God.
