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Rigorous honesty is the gateway to recovery in SA. At first, I thought that admitting the full extent of my problem and sharing my real history were impossible. What would others think?
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Our next edition’s theme is “A Great Caution is Advised.” This caution is in the White Book on page three, “We suggest that newcomers…not reveal their sexual past to a spouse or family member who does not already know of it, without careful consideration…” Similar caution is in the Big Book.
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My sponsor suggested that I periodically follow up with the professionals to give them an update on how the Fellowship is doing.
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Dear ESSAY,
I wanted to compliment you and your staff on the October Issue. Well done!
The graphics are outstanding, and the composition of text and graphics is very impactful.
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It Changed Both of Us
Step Five had a lasting impact on both sponsor and sponsee through the Sponsor-by-Mail program.
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Completely exposed before God with a wide open willingness for Him to take away her defects gave her a vital spiritual experience.
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He learned through the Program to be honest in every area of his life.
Rigorous honesty with myself is the best medicine for the disease because my disease comes out of denial—lying to myself and others. Before lust, I learned to fantasize and make up fun stories.
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Higher Power gives her the courage to turn her whole life over to the will of God.
When I hear the words “rigorous honesty,” all kinds of things go through my mind: bringing the inside out, sharing with others, writing Tenth Step inventories, making phone calls, and sharing honestly and sincerely in meetings.
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Honesty helps him take the Steps with sincerity of heart.
Honesty starts with my heart. My head is going to think of all kinds of reasons to dodge the truth.
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Her sponsor helped her admit deep resentment towards her adoptive mother.
Rigorous is “an adjective that means extremely thorough, exhaustive, or accurate.” Rigorous honesty is a commitment to complete truthfulness in all aspects of life, even when it’s difficult or has consequences. Phew.
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The Steps replace the addictive process with a Program of recovery.
This happened almost 20 years ago, when I was just beginning this recovery Program.
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Dio ha rimosso la sua paura e l’ha sostituita con la fede e con le opere.
Per tutta la vita ero stato così legato dalla paura che avevo perso la speranza di liberarmi. Attraverso il lavoro sui Passi, una luce brillante alla fine di un tunnel lungo, freddo e buio ha improvvisamente brillato con un calore confortante. Ad ogni passo, tuttavia, le paure continuavano a incombere. L’uso del semplice strumento dell’inventario Paura-Fede mi ha aiutato a tornare verso Dio e alla soluzione dei Passi Due e Tre.
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Identificare il problema e uscire da sé stesso gli permette di vivere nella fiducia e nella volontà di Dio.
Vorrei definire questi termini perché credo che, quando definiamo accuratamente un problema, arriviamo alla soluzione. Io intendo il senso di colpa come la sensazione sana e appropriata di disagio che provo quando ho causato un danno a me stesso o a qualcun altro. È un promemoria interno che mi invita ad agire per correggere il mio comportamento e, se possibile senza causare ulteriori danni, a riparare (se ho ferito qualcun altro). Il senso di colpa inoltre mi aiuta a evitare di ripetere quell’azione in futuro.
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La Liberacion
On the last Friday of every month, the SA group “La Liberación” in Bogotá joyfully celebrates the gift of sobriety. Each member is honored with a sobriety coin and a certificate—a powerful reminder of the journey we share.
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She discovered the two things that make up her self-esteem.
I learned very early that life was all about being a good girl, pleasing, being obedient and nice. I was being raised to be a good wife in the style of those days. My parents, of course, were blameless, giving me everything they knew to shape me as they had been.
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אלוהים העביר את הפחד שלה והחליף אותו עם אמונה שעובדת
כל ימי חיי הייתי כל כך כבולה על ידי פחד, איבדתי תקווה לחופש. דרך עבודת הצעדים, אור מזהיר בחמימות מנחמת זרח לפתע בקצה המנהרה הקרה והחשוכה. אך בכל צעד, פחדים המשיכו לצוץ. השימוש בכלי הפשוט של חשבון הנפש ”פחד לאמונה” עזר לי לכוון אותי שוב לאלוקים ולפתרון של הצעדים שניים ושלוש
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SA שמר עליו מפוכח, ובמקביל טיפול פסיכולוגי עזר לו להחלים מטראומה ובושה
אשתי גילתה את ההתמכרות שלי בפעם הראשונה לפני שהתחתנו. הבטחתי לה שאם היא רק תיתן לי עוד הזדמנות אחת, אני אקדיש את שארית חיי ללפצות אותה. בסופו של דבר זה היה שקר. היא גילתה את ההתמכרות שלי בפעם השנייה אחרי שהסתבכתי עם החוק. חיפשתי עזרה מקצועית. לצערי, איש המקצוע שפניתי אליו התייחס להתמכרות שלי כאל התנהגות כפייתית, והוא לא המליץ לי על תכנית 12 הצעדים. כמה חודשים אחרי שנגמר הטיפול, כבר חזרתי להשתמש
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עבודת הצעדים על פחד אפשרה לה לפעול תחת הכוונה אלוהית
אני נשואה כמעט 50 שנה. בעלי היה אכזרי בצורה בלתי נתפסת, אבל פחדתי לעזוב. הפחד הכי גדול שלי היה שלא אצליח לפרנס את עצמי, ושאהיה חסרת בית
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הוא חווה שינוי ע”י SA שעזר לו לראות את הזהות האמיתית שלו
הבעיה היא איננה הבעיה
כאשר הגעתי ל-SA ב-1999 בעקבות משברים בַּמשפחה ובמערכות יחסים, הייתי בסערת רגשות מבולגנת. באמת שלא הרגשתי דבר מלבד כעס. ידעתי בדיוק מה לעשות ואיך לפתור במהירות את כל העניינים בחיי, ובזריזות לחזור ל”נורמליות” שוב, לשחק בַּמשחק ‘משפחה מאושרת’
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הצעדים הסירו ממני את הבושה ואת הפרפקציוניזם – שילוב קטלני שחסם אותי מלהיות פגיעה
כשאני מרגישה בושה, אני מרגישה פגיעה. ההגדרה של פגיעות היא “חוסר היכולת להגן על עצמך מפני פציעה, התקפה, או לעג.” המילון גם מציין “אדם הזקוק לטיפול, תמיכה או הגנה מיוחדים

