Dear ESSAY
Dear Essay, Hello, recently we had the best Monday Noon meeting in quite a while here in Akron, Ohio. All due to the beautiful share [in the October 2019 Essay] of Wendi from Colorado! Her topic was “Practicing the Principles.”
Editors’ Corner
Dear Essay readers: This issue of Essay includes many stories on “Miracles In Recovery.” Our next issue in February, 2020 will focus on “Sober Dating.” Please send in any stories or short articles on your experience with dating experiences in Sexaholics Anonymous. Future topics include: Travel and SA Recovery in May, 2020 and Lost in Translations in August, 2020. Let us hear from you at essay@sa.org
Thank You, Kay!
In December, 1994 the SA International Central Office moved from Simi Valley, California to Nashville, Tennessee. Roy K. traveled to Nashville to help hire a new administrator. Our first administrator left shortly thereafter due to a death in her family. On August 28, 1995, Kay Shotwell began working as SAICO administrator.
Special Message About the Toronto International Conference
The SA Ontario Intergroup is working in collaboration with the S-Anon Ontario Central Intergroup to present “True North 2020: Happy, Joyous and Free,” the SA and S-Anon International Conventions in Toronto, Ontario, Canada, on July 24-26, 2020. We invite you to join us here in Toronto to take part in this inspirational recovery event.
Step Minus One
In 1992 I founded SA in Melbourne. I immersed myself in service, Step work, sponsorship, conference recordings, local and international conferences. At age 35 I began a period of prolonged sobriety. At some deep level I knew it was unsustainable. Even with all my inventory work, I sensed there was something I had trouble identifying deep inside. After 8 years I lost my sobriety and struggled for the next 10 years.
SA Internet Marathon (SIM) 2019!
For twenty-four hours in late November over 1,800 people signed up for the third global internet-based marathon for sexaholics. Participants used over 3,000 different devices to connect on one of the three channels provided. Channel A hosted twenty-four diverse speakers sharing on a wide range of topics (listed below).
The Importance of Steps 1 Through 12
Why are the 12 Steps in the order they are? To me, coming into SA, they just seemed so random. I didn’t care. I just did what I was told to do to get sober. I’m of the mind that it is NOT critical to understand why the Steps are the way they are at the start. But, as the Step 9 promise goes, “we will suddenly understand situations which used to baffle us.” I think that goes for the mysteries of the Steps too as we progress in sobriety.
Opposition Or Compassion
I am ready in Step 7 to ask God to remove another shortcoming and in Step 9 make amends to someone I hurt. I was ready with resentment and anger when my spouse opposed me or came to me with a complaint. In truth, it was never the content of her words but the temperature of my lust fever that determined my response because I wasn’t getting what I wanted.
Fantasy and Sobriety
It happened again. I was cooking the family meal and suddenly an attractive woman I know came to mind. I started thinking about her personality qualities and wondering if maybe God would want me to ask her out. It wasn’t lust, I thought — I was only thinking about her personality!
Drunk on Rage
The other morning I was going out for a run. A neighborhood next to ours has a hill coming down to a stop sign. I have run past this entrance several times and noticed that people tend to drive down the hill at a high rate of speed. This leads them to roll through the stop sign without stopping.
