I found myself fully confronted with this question back when I started working the Steps in earnest with a sponsor. Up until that time, I had been willing to settle for periodic “lengths” of sobriety. Because I’m an addict and quite insane when I’m lusting, I had figured that was good enough. I believed I could fight against lust.
How many times have I made that declaration? Hundreds, maybe thousands of times I have said those exact words. Recently I watched a TV survival show where 12 contestants were dumped in the ocean within swimming distance of various islands. They were required to write journals before and during the show. Everyone wrote some form of “I got this” at the beginning.
I love being in a program that cultivates both spirituality and self-development. I crave closeness to God and this program has helped me to find a spirituality that really satisfies, in addition to leading me back to the religion of my upbringing. I have found a God Who is loving and all-powerful, as described in Alcoholics Anonymous, and Who wants to have a relationship with me.
The reason why lust and sexual acting out are so attractive to me is because they are so very powerful at what they do in me. Initially, they were my “solutions” to other problems. Eventually I became addicted to them, and they failed to be solutions and became their own problems. But I didn’t have an alternative “solution” that would not enslave me just as lust and sexual acting out had done.
Attitude is a word I thought I understood when I first arrived at Sexaholics Anonymous, but really I did not understand it at all. A new heart was something that I thought I did not need when I arrived at SA, but I was wrong.
After five years of sobriety and co-ed religious formation, I thought I could be like normal people and have healthy friendships with the opposite sex. I had made many female friends in the previous years, women I hoped I could see as sisters and live in freedom.
A brief SA CFC report: I visited with the Israeli CFC committee (ICFC) and discussed utilizing SA for released prisoners. While there is some support, the rules of the Israeli prison structure condone only officially sanctioned offender programs. SA is not one of them. ICFC is determined to continue identifying potential allies who might be able to bring SA’s message to the bureaucracy.
The SA Fellowship continues to grow in multiple dimensions. While this growth may be challenging to the budgeting process, it is welcome as a result of the Fellowship’s on-going services to carry the message to those who still suffer.
Harvey and his wife had a destination planned for an SA event. God had other plans.
Dear Sir or Madam, Many thanks for putting ESSAY on the internet for us to have free download.
