En adicción activa, mi lema era “Estar solo en el cielo es más difícil que estar con una chica en el infierno”. En la primera infancia, no podía imaginar un mundo sin niñas. Solía ser ridiculizado por jugar con niñas en lugar de niños. A quién le importaba, en lo que a mí respecta; disfruté jugando inocentemente con las niñas.
Every morning my alarm goes off at 5:30 am. I get up, put on clothes over my pajamas and go outside for a 30-min walk. This is where my morning ritual begins, supporting the SA program with another method. This method is about mindset (attention, dedication, focus and meditation), about breathing and cold therapy.
In active addiction, my slogan was “Being alone in heaven is harder than being with a girl in hell.” In early childhood, I could not imagine a world without girls. I used to be ridiculed for playing with girls instead of boys. Who cared, as far as I was concerned; I enjoyed playing innocently with girls
A few days ago one of my dearest friends came up to me with good news. “I have a boyfriend!” she said. I was so happy for her. She really deserves it. I was always asking myself why someone as beautiful, kind and smart as she is wasn’t in a relationship. I even thought that maybe she had some kind of problem, like my sexaholism. Then it struck me that now I was (and still I am) the only single girl amongst my various groups of friends.
Loneliness, rejection, and fear have acted as a soundtrack in my head for as long as I can remember. They form rhythm and melodies filled with dissonance. Each track is made complete with a verse, chorus, and bridge:
Laughing is part of recovery! Here is one of my favorite AA jokes:
I have always worked a simple program because that is the only way I'm able to do it. I wasn't able to write my inventory like the AA Big Book recommends with the columns system. But on page 109 in the SA White Book the directions were simple which allowed me to do my inventories.
This morning in the hybrid Manchester, US “Not a Glum Lot meeting,” we read the first story “I’m a Sexaholic” from Member Stories 2007. The text from The Real Connection today was entitled “Hidden Desires” and talked about riding a motorcycle too close to the edge of the Grand Canyon.
My job is to take care of a large property with an orchard, a garden, and a house. A few weeks ago, I found myself in a completely new situation I have never been in before.
Read how two Dutch fellows have fellowship and fun in making recovery music, and share their joy with others.
