Practical Tools

A Morning Routine that Works (For Me)!

If I want a better relationship with someone or something (father, mother, wife, son, daughter, sponsor, golf clubs or friends) – in other words anyone or anything, what would I do? I would spend MORE time with them!! The key to being present to have more time with them is to “improve my conscience contact with God......” To improve my relationship with God I gotta spend time with him.

By |2024-04-14T14:00:54-05:00August 5, 2019|Comments Off on A Morning Routine that Works (For Me)!

A New Attitude and a New Heart

Attitude is a word I thought I understood when I first arrived at Sexaholics Anonymous, but really I did not understand it at all. A new heart was something that I thought I did not need when I arrived at SA, but I was wrong.

By |2024-04-21T14:55:12-05:00May 11, 2019|Comments Off on A New Attitude and a New Heart

Lust Goes Deeper

After five years of sobriety and co-ed religious formation, I thought I could be like normal people and have healthy friendships with the opposite sex. I had made many female friends in the previous years, women I hoped I could see as sisters and live in freedom.

By |2024-08-25T14:14:19-05:00May 11, 2019|Comments Off on Lust Goes Deeper

Forgiveness Is Worth The Effort

I have three things to share on the topic of forgiveness. #1: Why Forgive? The first, and most important, concerns why I forgive people. In a nutshell: I forgive because it helps ME.

By |2024-04-21T14:57:16-05:00May 11, 2019|Comments Off on Forgiveness Is Worth The Effort

A Good Sponsor…

As with a lot of things in the Program, I grew into sponsorship. First, I had to learn to be a good sponsee and work my own program well. Then when I began sponsoring, I learned from my sponsees. Here is what I have learned so far.

By |2024-08-25T14:17:04-05:00February 12, 2019|Comments Off on A Good Sponsor…

The Real Threat

As I sit here in meditation, it is dawning on me the biggest threat lust has on me is it takes the cord of my soul and plugs it into myself, as the White Book suggests. It is absolutely impossible for me to be truly present for my wife, my kids, and real-life significant relationships.

By |2024-04-21T14:57:45-05:00February 12, 2019|Comments Off on The Real Threat

Dealing with Fear

I would like to share how the program has given me the gift of lowering the volume of my fears. I cannot say that they are totally gone, but today I can live with them. I used to wake up in the morning with a feeling of dread when facing the day. The day scared me: the responsibilities, the fear of disappointing, the fear of surprises.

By |2024-04-21T14:57:35-05:00February 12, 2019|Comments Off on Dealing with Fear

Dear Masturbation

You have been there for my husband through our entire marriage, but you have been a disaster! You have been a stress and anxiety release for him, while causing more for me. You have been there when my husband watched TV, viewed pictures, watched porn, took showers, even next to me in bed. You were there with his fantasies about others, about me.

By |2024-04-21T15:00:02-05:00December 15, 2018|Comments Off on Dear Masturbation

Back to the Basics

It seems like only yesterday that my old friend and sponsor, Jess L., shared with me a wonderful story. He said that there once was a world-renowned football team that had successful seasons year after year. One year, however, things were not going well for the team. They were certainly not playing their best. Their famous, well-respected coach felt it was time to intervene.

By |2024-04-21T14:59:57-05:00December 15, 2018|Comments Off on Back to the Basics