In the beginning of the war, I was having another difficult night. I didn’t sleep well. I was lying (trying to sleep) in my common hall on the cold floor. Many cruise missiles were at that night over my country. After sleeping just for a few hours, I woke up and was extremely tired in the morning; realizing that somehow I survived, while other people might have some injuries or even could have died.

I sat there all alone one afternoon in a stunning location in Hawaii. And all of a sudden, a realization came over me. I understood that if I didn’t stop acting out now, I would be lost—for the rest of my life. I would never make any meaningful connection with anyone, and I would
descend lower and lower into moodiness, self-centered bitterness, cynicism, and despair.

ESSAY talked with Nancy S. from Columbus, Ohio, USA. She has been sober since December 15, 2004.

When she first encountered the Twelve Steps, she exclaimed, “What a great way to live!” Today, she has been sober in SA for almost twenty years, she’s actually living the Program like she said, and she’s an immense help to others in SA.

I didn’t think I could ever get sober. But “God could and [did when I sought Him]” (AA 60), and He does for [me] what [I] could not do for [myself] (AA 84).

The White Book assures me, “…we started sharing at meetings, telling our story, bringing the inside out. And we discovered that the way to feel better is not only going to meetings but taking the risk of self-disclosure” (SA 65). This is my story in addiction and in recovery.

I came to SA in November 2007 and was granted the grace of sobriety from the first meeting. It was the beginning of SA in our country, we didn’t have SA books or materials, so we used the support of NA-program Step books and an NA-sponsor. I first got involved in SA-literature translation in 2008 when I was offered to translate SA-literature into my native language.

Knowledge and pride have been big obstacles in my working the Program. “Knowing the Truth,” as mentioned in our White Book (SA 91), has been another obstacle. As I accumulated calendar sobriety, I was unsure why I kept feeling anxious about lust.

It took me a while to understand and put this into my daily program:

… the ex-problem [luster] who has found the solution, who is properly armed with facts about himself, can generally win the entire confidence of another [sexaholic] in a few hours. Until such an understanding is reached, little or nothing can be accomplished (AA 18).

I knew from the start of my journey in SA that our founder, Roy K. wrote Sexaholics Anonymous (the “White Book”) and then later learned that he also wrote Recovery Continues, Discovering the Principles, and several SA pamphlets. However, for many years, I wondered who writes all our other wonderful SA literature and what’s involved in the publication process. Then the opportunity arose to do international service, and I volunteered to join the Literature Committee.

In the chapter “Overcoming Lust and Temptation,” the White Book emphasizes the vital role that both AA and SA literature play in sustaining our sobriety and recovery, ensuring that there is at least one sober voice at meetings. These texts offer key insights into ourselves and a deeper understanding of the recovery principles. Roy states very clearly that Alcoholics Anonymous and the Twelve and Twelve constitute the basic texts of the original Twelve-Step program (SA 77).

The author of this article shares how he guides his sponsees through the 12 Steps, carefully following the program literature. This practice helps him stay engaged with the material on a regular basis.

Dear ESSAY, I wanted to share these photos of an unconventional meeting location.
I am a grateful member of the Žilina SA group in Slovakia. One of our fellows was instructed by his sponsor to attend at least two physical meetings per week. He sometimes travels to distant members who don’t have nearby meetings.

NEXT EDITION
The December edition will feature articles on sober dating written by members from around the world.

One of my friends in prison informed me that he is going to be paroled soon. He asked for advice on what he should do upon release. I asked him where he plans to live and sent him a list of meetings in his area with contact phone numbers. I asked if he had transportation to his location. If not, I suggested that he find a local bus service or transportation service.

Different forces propelled us to the first-ever SA India Workshop Weekend in Ashirvad, Bangalore. These forces included life-threatening spiritual bankruptcy, absolute failure of moderation and self-control, and a serendipitous string of events amidst desperate seeking.

A while ago, a fellow in my home group went through a difficult time and wondered why God let it happen. This reminded me of something that happened for me about two years ago.

Before getting sober, I was not a book person. In fact, I had never read a book cover-to-cover. I almost finished one book in school because it took me into a fantasy world, away from reality. Most reading for me, though, was distressing and pointless.

When I joined SA in the autumn of 2020, I was broken but willing to take direction. That’s because I was so desperate. Many years of experience in AA did afford me some advantages, though, including countless book study meetings and a good familiarity with the Big Book and the Twelve and Twelve. I even remembered some passages, like page 417 about acceptance, which I could still recite word for word. The stuff I memorised still serves as a kind of mental reference library.

At my first meeting of Sexaholics Anonymous, I heard someone read “The Problem,” and I knew that I was in the right place. In the White Book Roy wrote:

The October edition will be devoted to “Using the Literature of the Program,” which is the eighth tool in the chapter “Overcoming Lust and Temptation” (SA 161).

I just got back from the SA/S-Anon International Conventions in Los Angeles. This was the first International Convention in the United States since 2020, and the final registration count was 664! There were another 70 people around the world who joined sessions via livestream. Eleven countries were represented (including Kenya, Israel, and Belgium), 40 of the U.S. states, plus Puerto Rico and Washington D.C.