Single Yet Strangely Content
I’m a lust drunk from England, sober for 20 years—since April 12, 1995—by the grace of God and the fellowship of SA. But my road to SA was a long one.
The Fungus of the Soul
There I was in an Israeli prison, walking through a security checkpoint to visit an incarcerated SA member. What an ordeal! First, I had to empty my pockets. Then I had to take off my shoes. After that, I had to take off my socks and walk barefooted on a tile floor where other barefoot people—from all backgrounds—had been walking.
A Simple Prayer
These thoughts from the AA Big Book run through my mind nearly constantly: “Every day is a day when we must carry the vision of God’s will into all of our activities. How can I best serve Thee—Thy will (not mine) be done” (85). And, as emphasized on the same page, this is the proper use of my willpower.
It Has to Be a Miracle!
I’m Harvey A., a sexaholic from Nashville, TN. My sobriety date is March 8, 1984. I can hardly believe that I’m now 75 years old and have been sexually sober for more than 31 years. When I began the SA recovery program at age 44, I had a full head of hair that had not yet turned grey. At 75, what hair I have is completely grey. My outward appearance has changed over the past 31 years. But it’s the change in my inner self that I want to share with the fellowship today.
Come Join the Party
I’m Mike, a sexaholic, and I’ve been sexually sober since June 3, 1984. I’m grateful to the members of my home group, who have helped me stay sober for the past 30 years. I’m also grateful for my wife, who probably should have dumped me many times over the years, but for some reason she has chosen to stay. We have a pretty decent marriage today—but it wasn’t always that way.
Turning Off My Radar
My tale begins over 12 years ago. At the time, I observed that—as I walked from my car to a downtown SA meeting—I would often notice the women coming toward me or even across the road or on the sidewalk, and smile at them. Sometimes what I noticed about them turned to fantasy, and I would have to surrender this during the subsequent meeting.
I Want to Quit!
This autumn, I’ve been raking leaves in the yard and on the driveway. As I pull the piles of leaves together and get ready to put them in the wheelbarrow, I find the same refrain running through my head: “I want to quit doing this!” In practice, I just keep raking.
Surrender to the Process
The other day a friend called me with a question. He said that, at an SA meeting he attended the day before, he discovered that he had the most sobriety in the room. He asked me whether he could learn anything from a meeting where he has the most sobriety. I told him that—no matter how much sobriety I have—God is able to speak to me through other members with less sobriety.
Everyday Gratitude
My wife and I were putting away our Christmas tree this past December. It’s an artificial tree with lights wired into it, and it looks pretty in our front window at night. But packing it up for storage is a struggle.
Twenty-Five Years, One Day at a Time
Early on in my sobriety adventure with Sexaholics Anonymous, I heard the expression “One day at a time.” At the time my marriage was on the line and my acting out had caused me a lot of trouble. I wanted to be free from this sexaholic life for more than one day!
