Throughout my adolescence I was progressively consumed by same-sex behaviors and fantasies. I thought that the problem was being attracted to men. Acting out for 17 years shaped my whole thinking. “I was restless, irritable and discontented.” SA told me that actually the root was lust, and this was music to my ears. I began to detach from lust one day at a time and stopped carrying around my wound as a trophy.

I had just turned 21 when I entered the SA fellowship. I immediately knew SA was the program for me but I didn’t feel comfortable in the local fellowship since everyone else was at least twice my age.

I found SA shortly after I turned 28 years old. I heard an old-timer once on a tape say that he didn’t know why anyone under 30 would come to SA—they still had decades of good lusting left!

My name is José and I am a recovering sexaholic. I am only 25 years old and I joined SA when I was 19. Many ask me how I joined the fellowship so young and if I was really sure that I was a sexaholic. And my answer is always, “The fact that masturbation and lustful thoughts made me suffer so much and I wasn’t able to get out of it, said enough about my condition.”

Hi, I am a 20-year-old sexaholic from Poland. I was told about pornography on the internet by classmates about the age of 12, but didn’t get sucked in instantly. Around 13, I discovered masturbation, and then things started to get out of control.

My first memories are of fear, resentment and separation. Lust first came on the scene when I was four, my mother moved with us to a foreign country without my father. During my first few months in this new place I was sexually abused by kids several years older than myself. I was terrified anybody would find out, I was sure it was my fault and I felt guilty for enjoying the physical aspect and attention.

My name is Mike and I’m a sexaholic, sober since June 3, 1984. I imagine coming into the program at the age of 28 or 29 today would be much different than it was when I joined in the mid-1980s. Today, depending on where a person begins their SA journey, a new member might join a group in which most of the members were substantially older than they and also be blessed with much long-term sobriety.

Young and sober? It sounds like two galaxies crashing together! I am sexually sober by the grace of God, yours and my sponsor’s help since October 7, 2015. I have heard people say “Some guys get the grace from God, others don’t.” I do not believe in this. In my opinion, everyone has the same chance for recovery—and my God is a fair God.

When I stepped into my first SA meeting I was about 25 years old. When I think back on what I had experienced up to then and how I was feeling at the time, I am astonished at myself today; at how the program has changed me; the extent to which it has helped me. It’s a miracle, a miracle which is still unfolding.

I went back to my home group and shared what had happened. I had slipped and now it was time to face the dreaded walk back into the rooms and face the fellows I had been lying to for many years. The group was welcoming and supportive, I heard supportive and encouraging words like “It’s OK, it’s progressive victory” and “Keep coming back.”

The Game is a fun recovery game played in teams of five members for 30 days. The teams work together to earn recovery points by using SA Tools, one day at a time for 4 weeks. The team with the most “recovery points” after 30 days wins! It is a proven way to make friends and get support with your recovery!

One of the most effective Practical Tools is HUMOR.
CORONAVIRUS AND ADDICTION
We were MADE to survive this!

Yoga has become a parallel and interconnected path on my physical, emotional, and spiritual recovery. Recently, I took a Yin Yasa yoga class. The theme of the class was “letting go.” Hmmm, I thought as we proceeded, where have I heard that before?

Dear recovering friend,
Eighteen years ago, I became sexually sober and started my SA journey. As a CFC member, then Vice Chair, then Chair, I’ve been engaged in 12-Step correctional work with those on five continents.

Dear sponsor,
First of all, I hope and pray that you and your loved ones are in good health, and under God’s loving care. I want to thank you for the email. I appreciate your time and willingness to figure out a way to reach out to me.

Bob F. tells us how he continues to live in happy and joyous freedom during the pandemic.

We are in a new reality. Electronic meetings are going on around the world. They allow loners or travelers to join a meeting. I hear people say, “Yes, but they are not face-to-face meetings.” I beg to differ as they are face-to-face meetings. They are just not in person meetings.

Dear Essay readers,
The saying “Every dark cloud has a silver lining” conveys the notion that, no matter how bad a situation might seem, there is always some good aspect to it.

In the last few months, paradoxically because of the terrible pandemic, more members in India (and other “remote” places) are able to join international meetings on platforms like Zoom. This allows newcomers to see “how it’s done” from members with experience around the world.

The Spanish SA Winter Convention had a strong focus on staying sober with panelists from all over the Spanish-speaking world, among whom old-timer Harvey A. who shared his invigorating joy with us.