I’m Dave, a grateful recovering sexaholic, sober by God’s grace since January 2004. My wife has been active in recovery working both Al-Anon and S-Anon for many years. We share “the Real Connection” because we each work our own programs.

Sponsorship in SA has been a great blessing for me, and continues to be a (sometimes humbling) learning experience. In fact, I learn as much from the men I sponsor as I have from my sponsors!

In November 1971, I had a spiritual experience that changed my life direction. But for some reason God did not take away my bad habits when I asked Him to. My spiritual awakening that happened “as a result of these Steps” changed my life direction again—this time pointing me toward promoting life in myself and others.

In my early sobriety, SA service provided many opportunities for spiritual growth. My sponsor continually explained the need for a solid grounding in the Steps as the basis for successful service work. As I matured, so did my idea of “successful service.”

Members sometimes ask me, “Why should I do service? Won’t someone else do it? I don’t have the time!” But my sponsor always says: “SA was here when I needed it, and it is my responsibility to see that it is here for somebody else!”

Today a fellow in our group received his eight-month chip. I recalled how desperately upset he’d been when he first came to SA—but today he demonstrated a great peace and calmness. I realized that this is also my story.

Dear Fellow SA Members:
I’m grateful that more women have been attending SA meetings in recent years. By participating in this fellowship, women get to experience the same benefits of SA recovery as men do.

I was at a meeting today where a member shared about his anxieties and fears regarding events happening here in Denver. I wanted to grab him and tell him there is a solution—because in my own life I’ve had some victory in overcoming fear.

I had a dream in which a woman who was dumping me explained what she thought was wrong with me: “You are lost in self-pity,” she said. I awoke with nausea and a sense of dread. Oh no! Not self-pity!

It took me a while to let go of the idea that I could do this program on my own. I’d been raised to be self-sufficient. I had to figure out how to take care of myself and solve problems on my own. As you can guess, this hasn’t worked for me.

Mark told me once that no one ever died from sex. He said, “Alcohol, on the other hand, will kill you. It’s a chemical fact. If I drink I’ll die.” What Mark didn’t say was that he was going to die anyway.

My father was admitted to the hospital in June 2008. The doctors said he needed a heart valve in order to live. He risked the surgery so that he might be around longer for his grandchildren. It didn’t work out so well: he was in a coma between life and death for six weeks. It was hard to see him so powerless.

I had just arrived at the Nashville airport when I got a voicemail from Jim. The message was “I just got back from the doctor and he told me I have six months to live.” Jim was dead within two weeks. After receiving the message, I immediately called him. I told him how much I loved him and how he was always the brother I never felt I really had.

Dear Son:
It is amazing to see the very same issue that I experienced with my mother reappear in my relationship with you. The same wedge of estrangement, resentment, and detachment that I created and nourished with her has also developed in my relationship with you.

Recently my local Intergroup inspired me to create a flyer that could be handed out to women attending their first SA meeting. An SA’s first meeting can be such a key moment of willingness and admission of powerlessness.

On a beautiful October weekend in the Pacific Northwest, eight recovering sexaholics retired to a quiet retreat overlooking the San Juan Islands to spend one day in silence with the God of our understanding, and one more day in thankful and joyous fellowship.

My name is Jo; I’m a recovering sexaholic in New Zealand. I have been sexually sober by the grace of God since April 7, 2007.

Leprosy is a dread disease. It horribly disfigures and numbs one to pain. If that were not enough, there is an immense social stigma involved. People do not associate with a leper and keep their distance. The leper cries out, “Unclean! Unclean!”

I remember sitting in our counselor’s office when my husband told me he wanted a divorce. I was devastated. Not because I loved him all that much. My ongoing emotional affairs with the men at work, combined with sexual fantasies and masturbation, were dearer to me than my husband was at the time.

CFC offers assistance to those who carry the message of Twelve Step recovery into the prisons. During the past year, we have responded to requests for literature and for help in starting prison meetings from many different states and other countries.