Magazine

JUNE 1999

TRUDGING THE ROAD OF HAPPY DESTINY

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In Every Issue

TABLE OF CONTENTS

Enjoy reading all the articles of the current magazine below.

Trudging the Road of Happy Destiny
Every time we say—and it sounds contradictory, doesn’t it?—we are trudging the Road of Happy Destiny, trudging sounds like a burdensome sort of thing, and Happy Destiny a bit odd, too. And every time we say that, which is at every meeting, there’s a sort of a snicker, or you feel a heaviness, or there’s a bit of a smile as you say “trudging the Road of Happy Destiny.”

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Surrendering Relationships
I have been sober in SA for a little over four years. I would like to share some things that have worked for me as a single sexaholic:

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Surrender—Winning by Losing
For me, the concept of SA surrender calls to mind the image of a balloon being inflated. As air surges into the balloon, a battle begins. The air, called lust, says, “Ever see a balloon burst? It doesn’t have a small, neat hole in it. It is totally blown apart. I’m going to burst you into tatters and shreds.”

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Staying Sober as a Loner
My story of sexual sobriety is like an exodus story. In May 1997, I left familiar surroundings and boarded a flight to Rome. On that day I surrendered everything to God—my addiction to lust, my life and work as a priest, my objects of sexual obsession and emotional dependency, lustful movies, pornography, inappropriate touching of minors and women on public transports, having to resign from a job of trust, loss of trust, dignity and direction, and a cancelled schedule for psychiatric treatment.

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Food for the Soul
It started about eight years ago when several men who were awaiting sentencing began attending local SA meetings. Although I suspected they were attending the meetings in an attempt to influence the court, I gradually learned this was not the primary motivation of all of them.

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Group News
Over the past months, 12 SA groups in the northern Virginia/Washington D.C. region have voted to clarify “spouse” and “marriage” in the SA definition of sobriety, stating that sober sex in SA can find its expression only in a vowed and legal union between a man and a woman. This clarification now is read at the beginning of these groups’ meetings.

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Trudging the Road in the Northwest
The Northwest Region held its biannual retreat May 23 – 25. There were 70 members of SA and S-Anon in attendance.

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Voting at Intergroup
Recently a motion at my local Intergroup almost failed to win approval. Had it failed, two members with less than 30 days’ sobriety would have provided the margin for defeat. By comparison with AA, on whose experience the Traditions are based, the sobriety of AA representatives to Intergroup is generally measured in years. At the group level, many SA groups require members to have 30 days’ sobriety to vote at business meetings. Intergroup reps should have at least the same length of sobriety to vote.

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